Monday 10 September 2018

A wedding or a marriage

When I was organising our wedding we wanted it to be all very low key. Apart from the legal bit everything else happened in our garden. I made my dress just two weeks before the wedding and I bought the food the day before. I didn't have to arrange a venue or music or flowers. I carried a few sprigs of lavender and rosemary cut from my garden just before we set off for the register office. We spent £800 mostly on food and drink.

My tenant got married over the bank holiday weekend, God knows how much the event cost. Amongst other expenses they hired an entire hotel albeit a small one, it cost £7800 for one day/night. They hired it for the three day weekend!
Then there was the cost of the wedding dress, suits for the menfolk and the bridesmaid dresses.
Add on the flowers and the honeymoon, the mind boggles.

This weekend I read a brief article that said the more you spend on your wedding, the shorter time your marriage will last.

I'm not sure if it's true, but I do know a few people who have had very short-term marriages and yet spent thousands on their wedding. 

10 comments:

Joan (Devon) said...

It could be true! My youngest brother's first marriage was an elaborate affair with top hat and tails, but it didn't last long. His second marriage was in a register office and is still going strong.
My eldest brother and I both had register office weddings and both are still surviving after over 45 years.

Fiona Jerome said...

Might it be that people who really want to be married and together don't wait until they can afford a big wedding, they just do it anyway? We got married in off the peg clothing we already owned, had 8 guests and went for a Chinese meal afterwards. The ceremony was early in the morning because there was no other slot available in the period we wanted, as we had already booked a holiday when we decided to get married, so wanted to have that as our honeymoon. This year will be our 25th anniversary and I have absolutely no regrets about not having a white dress or a stately home as a backdrop for our wedding. The garden at Enfield Registry Office was dappled with golden coins where the sun came through the birch boughs when we took our photos. I couldn't imagine anything more beautiful, and I fondly remember every second.

Tracy said...

I think it is a symptom of the modern obsession with celebrity. Everyone can be a superstar for one day, regardless of the cost or the years spent paying it all off afterwards. Very sad. Cheapy wedding here, but 29 years married and no regrets!

Col said...

We both come from small families, so we only had 32 guests all in!
DH got a new suit, I bought a wedding dress in the January sales, we hired one car, from a funeral directors, I dislike white wedding cars intensely.
A friend from work did my flowers, headdress and cake topper and another friend made us a three tier cake.
We had a reception at a local hotel, where we'd had our first date, and honeymooned for four days in Herefordshire.
The total cost of everything, including our outfits was just a tad over £1000, paid by my mum and dad.
This was in 1985, and we're still here and happy together, so maybe cheap is the way to go!

Anonymous said...

Do they happen to moan about not being able to afford to buy a house? Deborah

Islandmaid said...

Hmmm, for some it's all about the Wedding, like you, it was about the marriage for us, 20 guests, register office, lovely lunch at our favourite restaurant, then off to the pub with our very best friends for an evening of laughs and fun, less than £1000 including a good wedge behind the bar with a password to get free drinks 🤣👍

PS your dress was gorgeous, you clever lady x

justjill said...

Registry Office for us. 38 years.

Anonymous said...

Hmm.

No engagement ring, an end of terrace for £9.5K.

25 guests, reception cost £125 - £5 off for cash.

Just completed 33 years hard labour.

My niece had the works: the marriage was over 18 months before the honeymoon (Egypt) loan was paid off.

I think your wedding was superb: I wish I'd thought of / had the nerve back in the day.

W

Siebrie said...

My parents gave us €2,000 for the wedding, we spent about half that: both dress and suit 'off the rack', registry office wedding (Grand Market Place, Brussels, lovely old building), picknick in the city farm next to our apartment in Central Brussels. Just my parents, sister with family, a few friends with their families; about 30 guests in total.

We bought all the food the days before, and had 2 acquaintances cook the hot meal in our apartment, then bring it down to the little house of the city farm. Wonderful weather, enjoyable day. Married 10 years now.

Eilidh said...

I'd love to see a pic of the dress. I love making my own clothes.

Pavement special

On one of  yesterday's dog walks I stopped to talk to a South African lady. She has three small children and a small black dog. She aske...