Is it a sign?

I've often thought that I should hang a sign on my back when I'm walking Beano or walking to the shop. 

The sign would say I'm not pissed, I've had a stroke!

Although it was years ago that I had my stroke my balance is still buggered. I'm more stable on my feet than I was at first but I still wobble a bit and sometimes I stagger. When I first had the stroke I walked with a stick for extra support but Steve hated me using a stick as it made me look old and reflected badly on him so I managed without. I also walk more here than when I lived with Steve as he disliked me going out to the shops or walking Beano. I suggested many times that he was walked Beano with me as I would feel safer, he did finally walk with me on one walk, the day before I left him!

I now need a second sign to hang on Beano when the weather is hot.

This one would say She's not walking me, I'm walking her!

 People see me waking along the pavement with Beano and don't realise I'm literally a few meters from my front door. Beano refuses to go to the toilet in his own garden (I've no idea why) and so we walk down the garden path beside my grass, to the pavement where there is a grass verge. There Beano will happily empty himself and then we walk back along the garden path and back indoors.