Thursday 21 July 2016

Hearing aid ceremony

Every morning we have the Fitting of the Hearing Aid Ceremony.

It takes more time and is possibly more complicated than a Japanese tea ceremony.

It can only be carried out in complete silence, and attempt at conversation is met with upheld hands and a pained expression.

First the aids have to be found, even though they are always in the same place. But much searching and muttering takes place.

Then they must be placed on a piece of kitchen roll, that is its self placed on a table mat.

Each aid is then brushed and poked thoroughly to his satisfaction.

One is then placed in the appropriate ear, the battery door closed and the beeps carefully counted.

This is then repeated for the other aid.

Of course the beeps don't always match, this is then the cause of much swearing and cursing and the aids being removed, with the whole rigmarole taking place again.

I also wear hearing aids, I grab mine from the pot they are kept in, wipe them over with an antibac wipe as instructed and shove them in. I usually fit them as I am walking to the car, it takes seconds and involves no pained requests for silence, no upheld hands and no swearing. I can also carry on a conversation whilst doing this.

11 comments:

Elaine said...

My husband has a similar performance, I contrive to be elsewhere - walking the goldfish, milking the budgie or scrubbing the roof, anywhere but there.

Anonymous said...

This is hilarious! My husband just got hearing aids and it's still hard for him to remember to put them in! I joke that, after 45 years of wedded bliss, I have worn out his ears. JanF

sweet blondie blue eyes said...

OH recently got hearing aids, he never remembers to put them in but when he does its painful, he tries to put them in every which way but the correct one. The performance when the batteries run down is something else.

Me? Like you Hester, I know where mine is, I stick it in my ear whilst doing other things, if the battery goes down I just repalce it!!

Fishcake_random said...

My book arrived today. Thank you x x z

Hard up Hester said...

It seems to be the men who have trouble with their hearing aids, we women seem to cope better.

So glad it arrived, hope you enjoy it.

Poppypatchwork said...

Which is as I always say 'A man can do anything a woman can do', but we do it quicker and a man has to be telling you the whole way through what he is doing, my hubby's way is to huff and puff, and I've just finished ........

Sheila said...

Oh God.....I will be blocking all attempts for my husband to get hearing aids if he ever needs them. Mind you I don't know which is worse that or the fact that I have to repeat virtually every word I say these days-x-

kelley said...

men...

keth said...

mine just go in. no antibacterial wipes, no hoohaa, just in, on, get on with it. But then, I have been wearing them since I was around 4 years old so that does make a big difference!

Rambler said...

An elderly friend of mine is constantly complaining that they don't work properly. She has digital hearing aids, which were carefully adjusted to her ears by a professional. So, when they 'play up', she snatches them from her ears and bangs them several times on the table before twiddling with them and returning them to her ears. Still not working properly!!!

Hard up Hester said...

Keth, I was advised to use the wipes as I suffer from hay fever and my ears get itchy.

Rambler, lol, well that will do them a lot of good.

There is a notice in the clinic I attend telling people not to put their aids in the kettle when they make their morning cuppa.

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