We may be going to visit FIL this weekend, or we may not, he can't decide, he will ring us at some point when he has decided!
Witch Hazel, thanks for the link, LM, Anon, a UTI could be a possibility or dementia. I'm inclined to think that the bulk of the problems are alcohol related, mainly as he seems to be ok first thing in the morning but deteriorates as the day draws on.
If he decides we can visit this weekend I will try to find out more about how he is feeling and coping.
It's been a nightmare at work today, very stressful, I have 1000 booklets to print on top of my normal jobs and both my machines were jamming. The engineer came to see if he could help, he got them working again but I'm not sure how long for.
I went back to Slimming World, I've put on 3lbs, I need to get a grip! I've realised I will have to cook 2 different meals every night as my L&M won't eat any of the SW meals. I also find breakfast difficult, I eat at 5:30 and there is a limit to how much prep I feel like doing that early in the morning. Also whatever I eat need to last me until 12 non when I get my lunch break.
I've had an epic fail on the housework front, I tried to follow the Flylady Thread but 3 days this week I've left work at 2, gone to the bank or Dr's etc, gone back to collect hubby at 3. Then gone out to collect one of the DGC at 4, spent an hour or two at dance club or similar, got home at 6ish cooked a meal, eaten it, cleared up after by which time I'm knackered, must try harder!
Scrimping and saving, ranting and raving. Past retirement age.
9 comments:
I don't know whether there is anything left to try harder with, I think you are working beyond capacity as it is! To be fair to FIL, uncle has vascular dementia and he is better in the morning. Father was always with it, though frequently pickled. However it may just be that without the moderating influence of MIL he may just be more of a, well, insert word here.
Good luck. x
Sundowning is the nursing term. Day goes great and as the sun goes down the behaviours change. I've seen it over my years as a nurse and the changes can be truly horrific. Nice people turning into horrible, abusive beings as the sun goes down, some becoming physically abusive as well as verbally.
Seriously, I don't even think that Dr. Who with the ability to shift time and space cold do more with your schedule!
With home cooked meals.... and clean knickers, I'd say that you were far ahead of the game.
The breakfast oats on a jar thingy that SW do might help with the breakfast issue and you can use other cereals too
From Margie in Toronto - I'm dieting as well and have almost as long a stretch between breakfast & lunch - I find that lots of protein really helps to keep me going - since you are short on time I'd suggest yogurt or cottage cheese with fruit (I use mostly frozen and/or canned in the winter). Hard boil a number of eggs, peel and keep them in the fridge - sometimes dip them in humus for extra protein - grape tomatoes - wedges of cheese - the protein seems to keep me going longer than carbs.
As everyone else has noted - I don't know how you manage to do everything that you do so take care and cut yourself some slack. Take care.
I eat porridge in the morning, jus three mins in microwave at 6.30 and I'm full to one. Don't be too hard on yourself if your day is full housework can wait, if any one objects they can do it.
Stuff the housework! You're dealing with a huge number of things at the moment, both physically (like work and all the running around) and emotionally (grief from death of MIL, stress from BIL and from FIL). When you're used to being strong and in control, it's hard to find you're "not coping" (from your point of view).
It sounds to me like your elastic band that has been stretched and stretched and currently can't quite stretch any more. Let the band relax a bit - let a few things go and genuinely don't let it bother you. It'll wait. When you're dead, no one is going to stand up and say "I'll say one thing about Hester, she kept a clean house!" I'm with jill on this - clean knickers.
Take care of yourself too xxx
Phew, this post makes me dizzy, but then I suppose when all the kids were at home I did similar. I wonder where I got all the energy from in those days.
Briony
x
A frequent cause of dementia getting worse is dehydration; I do wonder if FiL is drinking enough (not including the alcohol - that makes him even more dehydrated!) But the 'getting worse as the day goes on'is also a common symptom.
Is there no way you could cut down on all the chauffeuring? Could hubby make his own way home? Is there anyone else who could collect the grandchildren? I know how hard it is to say 'No', but you can't keep stretching yourself like this without making yourself ill.
Have a gentle (((((((hug))))))), Hester, it sounds as though you need one.
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