Wednesday 28 December 2022

Reply to Chinadogs

 Chinadogs. Steve has no concept of how upsetting his behaviour is. He is very unkind and hurtful but if I try to explain, he cannot grasp why I am upset.

The article I shared previously was also about a stroke survivor, it's not that rare unfortunately but mainly seems to affect men!

When I find his behaviour completely unacceptable I tell him, calmly. There is no point getting upset as he just gets defensive and angry.

I have to admit that I mostly step back and ignore him, he has had friends comment on his behaviour, his friends, not mine. But he always has an excuse.

I assume this is his basic personality and maybe he tempered his 'honesty' to appear more acceptable, who knows? According to some Drs this isn't a known side effect of having a stroke but to the staff at the stroke club we used to attend, it's actually very common.

Tuesday 27 December 2022

That's it for another year

DS1 and his GF have just left, it was lovely to see them both, it's easier for people to visit now we are on dry land.

We showed them round our new home, which took about 5 minutes. Then we had lunch, I'd bought some nibbles which were all eaten. I can't do a cooked meal easily as we don't yet have a table. They bought me a bunch of roses which are currently sat in my spare kettle as I don't seem to have a vase. I must buy one next time I'm out.

Steve seems to be sulking yet again I have no idea why and zero interest in discovering the reason.

Thursday 22 December 2022


Beano's foot is much improved, getting medication into him is, as usual, a riot. 

He is very suspicious when he is given a treat.

If he does take the treat he is likely to eject the tablet once he discovers it!

I've tried cheese, cheese spread, yoghurt, meat paste, a sweetie and with all these he ate the treat and spat the tablet back out. 

Eventually he took it with a small slice of ham, not packet sliced ham, real ham cut from a joint. Fortunately he only has to take them for five days so our budget should survive!

Tuesday 20 December 2022

Beano goes to the vet

Beano visited the vet yesterday as he has a sore on his foot. We saw a lovely vet with blue and green hair. Beano, of course made a huge fuss, especially when the vet trimmed the fur on his foot. Fortunately Jennie came with me as I was struggling to hold Beano still.

The vet cleaned his foot, gave him two injections and two packets of pills. Getting him to take them will be fun!

I shall make Beano wear a shoe when I take him out for walks today. The problem with his foot started because our car park was gritted and the salt got into his foot. Living on a boat meant he'd not encountered gritted pavements before, I shall be more careful in future.

Sunday 18 December 2022

I'm back

I've updated my kindle and I lost my login for blogger and Facebook. I've finally got around to sorting it all out.

Also Beano has got a very sore pad as our car park was covered in salt. As we've spent years living in a boat I didn't realise that Beano has real problems with the grit/salt that is spread around to stop people falling. I will be more careful from now on. Beano has shoes on order and I'm washing his feet regularly. You can imagine how happy he is about  the washing and I don't think he will like the shoes either! It's currently raining so Beano has no interest in going out until it stops.

Steve is as usual extremely grumpy, he hates the rain, winter, the neighbours, the weather, christmas, me, my family, the flat, the food he bought when he went shopping,  yadda, yadda, yadda.

We have a Tesco order arriving today and another piece of furniture, Steve can put it together and carry on complaining!

Sunday 11 December 2022

Thursday 8 December 2022

There was one box left to unpack!

 I'd just sat down for a rest when Steve decided to unpack the last box, he told me to come and help.

I told him no, I was taking a breather. I've unpacked every other bloody box!

Cue a major tantrum and stuff in the box thrown away, heyho, hopefully nothing important.

It's bitterly cold today, Steve went into Reading to have a pub breakfast and look for a wall unit to store all his crap. He couldn't find what he wanted.

He's decided we won't have a TV as he can't find a unit he likes to stand it on. I'm not bothered as my eyesight is deteriorating so quickly I wouldn't be able to watch it for long.

He's sulking now, there are people in the summer house, he is complaining that I'm not going to join them and he gave up the boat for nothing. I don't need to spend every waking minute with the neighbours and he'd soon complain if I did. I'm just grateful that the neighbours are friendly and there are things going on that I can join in with.

Wednesday 7 December 2022

Do i need a microwave?

Do I need a microwave? I've managed without one for years as there was no room in either of the boats. But Jennie bought me one and it is useful. I'm hoping to persuade Steve to extend the kitchen work surface and then there would be room as my microwave is quite small. Weirdly the work surface in the kitchen only covers part of the wall, it's a very strange layout that I'm hoping to improve on. I know Steve is intending to buy another fridge as he finds it inconvenient having food in the fridge as it limits the amount of beer he fit in.

I'm waiting to hear if Jennie needs me to care for Jojo today Jojo is unwell and has been off school. But Jennie is only allowed two days of paid leave and she's really not in a position to manage without pay. So if Jojo is still unwell I shall go over to sit with her.

Flis, it's hard work caring for someone isn't it, especially when they no longer seen like the person they were.

Thank you all for your kind comments, I do appreciate them and I'm hoping to get more organised and reply more regularly.

Tuesday 6 December 2022

Settling in.

We're getting sorted slowly and are down to the last couple of boxes. These have Steve's name on them but if I don't want to be tripping over them into next year I decided I may as well get them unpacked.

Y'day afternoon I saw people gathering in the summer house so I wandered over to introduce my self. It seems they meet most weekday afternoons for a chat and a cuppa. I was made welcome and shall go again.

The rule for pets here is that if you've already got a pet you can bring it with you but you cannot get a new pet once you have moved in. So Beano is ok, he's met a few of the neighbours and so far has been a hit with them. There is a lady with two Bichons and I've seen a beautiful black and white cat in the garden, it looks like Jess from Postman Pat.

I'm making a list of things need, picture hooks come to mind so far. We need to buy blinds for the window as the current curtains cut the bay window off from the rest of the room. Steve wants to buy a unit to keep all his gibble in, I've told him he cannot fill the bay window up otherwise we will look like Steptoe 's junk yard.

Steve is still not happy and moans constantly but then he used to moan and complain when we were on the boat

Monday 5 December 2022

First pic.

                        The view from the living room window.

                        On the left, other flats in the complex.

On the right, the summer house.

Friday 2 December 2022

And we're in!

Bob arrived with his camper van just after 9 o'clock he did two trips for us and then had to go to work but he worked really hard. This was good as Steve was struggling a bit, the first trip was ok but he really struggled with the second one.

Bob was very complimentary about our new home, despite Steve complaining about it!

We have a bay window overlooking the garden  which is lovely, it's nicely planted and well kept.

We've unpacked about 75% of our boxes, I'll unpack a couple more boxes once Steve's gone to bed and the rest I'll do in the morning before he gets up.

I know I shall change things around as I get used to living in a smaller area although it's a lot bigger than the boat.

I'll post some pics tomorrow or the day after.

Thursday 1 December 2022

Will we won't we?

Today is moving day, that is as long as Bob remembers as he is moving us! 

He can be a little flakey, Steve told him to get here by 9,  I've no idea why as I can't see Steve getting up before 10!

I don't know how big his camper van is so I don't know how many trips it will take, plus it is a long walk from the car park to the flat.

What will be will be, either way Steve will end up in a strop.

Steve hasn't packed any of his stuff yet, he is of the  the mistaken opinion that he travels light and has very little in the way of belongings. There is a very full double wardrobe and single wardrobe in the bedroom plus drawers. That's just his clothes, all mine fitted in a single drawer and  on three coat hangers!

Almost there.

I'm packing boxes and Beano is stressed, he's not sure what is going on.

Steve is at the new flat and bombarding me with messages, it seems the immersion doesn't work.

Nemmind it will all get sorted eventually.

Bob is moving us tomorrow.

I've no idea how many trips it will take as I've no idea how big his  van is.

Steve is panicking as usual, he's attempting to pay the council tax and electric bill immediately but the place has been empty for 6 months and the electric wasn't turned off. I'd rather approach things slowly and  check them out. Steve thinks we will be evicted if we don't pay the bills before we move in.

Monday 28 November 2022


 Will it/won't it?

Our furniture is due to arrive at the flat today so Steve has gone over to let it in.

Yesterday Steve was wittering on about how he needed to be at the flat by 6am in case the furniture arrived early. I told him Jennie wasn't picking him up until after the school run. Cue meltdown number 1.

He announced part way through the evening that the items were being delivered at 11am and 4pm, I did ask which was arriving when but this caused meltdown number 2 so I didn't get a straight answer. 

Sometimes Steve invents things to give him an excuse to go out when it's not actually necessary so I left him to get on with it.

He's messaged me to say nothing has arrived, cue meltdown number 3, I asked which item was due at 11am but got no response, or not one that made sense.

He's since messaged me to say the bed base will be another 10 days. It doesn't matter as we  can either sleep on the mattress or on the sofa, if either of them turn up!

If neither of them arrive I am still moving in and I will sleep on a reclining garden chair until things are sorted.

I know the sofa was definitely ordered as I placed the order myself.

As for the bed? Who knows, maybe Steve only thinks he ordered it!

Friday 25 November 2022

And so it begins.

I've said all along that one of my reasons for leaving the boat was the isolation.

It got worse after Steve had his stroke, he started to avoid people, during lockdown we were in the marina and we had friends there. After lockdown we all went our separate ways and Steve was able to moor away from people which made it more difficult for me.

I know my deafness made it harder than normal but I've been losing my hearing for years now so I know what I can and cannot cope with.

Steve is not happy with the place we have chosen partly be cause it has a thriving social life but if he wishes to avoid people he still can.

We don't move in until 2nd or 3rd December as Steve is delaying it until the last possible moment but I can cope with that.

Yesterday I had a message from someone I used to work with, she helps run a social group not far from where I'm moving to and she invited Steve and I along.

I'm pretty sure Steve will refuse to go but I shall visit. It might not be my thing but I shall give it a go.

I sometimes find social events difficult because of my hearing, I'm better with small groups but I shan't know unless I try and I'm determined to try anything and everything available.

Monday 21 November 2022

Shopping trip

 We went to the new flat today to measure up and then on to buy furniture.

We bought a sofa and chair, a nest of coffee tables and I bought a small slow cooker. We came home and Steve has ordered a mattress and bed base. We wanted a folding table but couldn't find one small enough.

Our friends Clive and Wendy came over to see us, we told them about our  shopping spree, Wendy mentioned that her mum was getting rid of a small table with four chairs. It's exactly what Steve wants so Wendy will drop it off with us one day soon.

All in all a very successful day.

Sunday 20 November 2022

More about the flat.

The flat is fully carpeted and has curtains, a cooker, fridge/freezer and microwave.  We have our own microwave and probably won't use the cooker much as we have an air fryer.

We hopefully will only need a few pieces of furniture. 

We are going tomorrow to measure up and then on to a large charity warehouse to buy what we need. Steve would prefer to buy new but he always buys cheap crap that falls apart in no time.

Jennie went over on Friday and said the flat got very warm, very quickly when she tried the heating. She also spoke to a resident who was very pleased to hear that is a couple moving in as they are short of men. I'm not telling Steve as he will automatically decide he's not going to speak to anyone. 

I intend to join in with anything and everything on offer, I've spent too many years isolated on the boat. I'm hoping that if I start joining in that Steve will be but if not I still will.

Saturday 12 November 2022


I'm still feeling under the weather.

I'm supposed to be taking an assortment of medication, I've run out of one already. The surgery  won't supply it because the hospital should have supplied enough and the hospital won't supply what I need because it's up to the surgery!

Steve is spending part of every day having a meltdown, it seems it's all my fault! He launches from one complaint to the other, hardly pausing for breath.

He feels very hard done by as I expect him to come with me when I walk Beano at lunchtime, I manage the other walks on my own. But I feel Steve really needs to get some exercise, he spends every walk telling me how he'd rather do a ten mile walk than the stroll in the woods that we do. He's not done a walk on his own in the twenty-odd years I've known him! Still be likes to complain that I'm holding him back. 

He seems to have a complete fantasy life tucked away in his brain somewhere. I just smile and nod and let him witter on.

He's taken over ALL the cooking, apart from the days he can't be bothered, in these days in allowed to cook, though mostly I do it wrong!

We finally have a moving date, we'll we have four or five actually, I'm not getting excited until all parties can agree on a single date.

Monday 7 November 2022

It's all going tits up!

DD1 is in hospital she had surgery y'day and hopefully will be home today.

Steve's had a phone call from his youngest brother, their stepfather is causing problems with his neighbours. He's made a pass at a neighbour, the house is filled with rubbish and they don't know where he is, the neighbours think he may have been admitted to hospital.

Steve and I went to a wedding earlier in the year, one of Steve's brothers, his wife has left him and taken the car he bought her!

Our landlord has said we can stay put until after Christmas, their relatives are only staying for a couple of days. This is great news as trying to find another Airbnb was driving me to distraction.

Thursday 3 November 2022


Sorry for not replying to all your comments, I do appreciate them but I'm struggling a bit.

It's partly the after effects of being unwell and partly lack of sleep. My blood pressure is through the roof unsurprisingly and I'm likely to punch the next person who tells me to relax! 

Our bed is too small, Steve is a very restless sleeper and throws himself around the bed throughout the night, thrashing and kicking. He is also struggling as he doesn't cope well with stress.

We visited our solicitor yesterday to sign some documentation, he explained the hold up. It seems the vendor is, understandably desperate to complete rapidly but has mislaid documents he is supposed to sign! Godess give me strength!

It now looks like we will not be in by  Christmas, our landlord has family staying for the Christmas period so needs this place back.

As you may imagine Steve is reacting very badly to this news. I'm decidedly unhappy too but I'm less vocal about it.

I'm not sure I can cope with moving into yet another  Airbnb a couple of days before Christmas especially since we now have all our boxed up belongings surrounding us.

Tuesday 1 November 2022

Thank you

 For all your comments.

I'm feeling slightly better today although I still get tired and nap during the day. I don't sleep well at night as Steve is tossing and turning, it's like sleeping on a trampoline. Roll on getting into our flat and a different bed.

Beano hasn't attempted to run away again and Steve is still doing the cooking and housework. He is also calming down and not screaming and shouting throughout the day which is much more restful. Though he did have one rant today about the new flat, insisting he wants to pull out as its taking too long. Exactly where he thinks we will go I have no idea, but I just ignored him! It must be nearly killing him not being able to scream and shout. He's not used to practising self control since he had his stroke.

We are walking about four miles a day but this is divided between 3 or 4  walks, today we have had torrential rain and hail and had to get changed when we arrived home. Beano was most disapproving.

Monday 31 October 2022


 I let Beano out early evening yesterday, he set off at speed!

I was extremely surprised as he rarely strays from my side.

I ran after him but by the time I reached the front garden he had crossed the road and was on the grass bank on the other side.

I followed him and made a grab for him, I couldn't pick him up as I'm not steady enough on my feet.

I had a tea towel with me so I looped it through his collar and let him wander about a bit. He'd obviously caught the scent of something.

Eventually I persuaded him to head for home, Steve was looking for me. He went absolutely ballistic and still hasn't really calmed down yet.

I think Beano must have caught the scent of a bitch in heat as he never usually runs off.

Saturday 29 October 2022

Catch up

It seems I  had a stroke  last week. I know I suddenly developed double vision but as I've known for years that I would go blind at some point I just assumed that was what was happening.

It's hard work dealing with Steve and trying to sort out the move and I can't hear clearly anymore so it's all been a bit much.

Most things land on my shoulders or my daughters as Steve really isn't one of life's copers.

Jennie was worried about me so dragged me to the optician to get my eyes checked. The optician sent us to Eye Casualty where  we spent 6 hours being shunted from pillar to post with no clear answer to what was causing my double vision.

Eventually I was sent to Acute Medical where I sat until about 9:30 at which point I was admitted onto a ward. I was sent home yesterday with a carrier bag full of drugs and lots of paperwork and many instructions.

Steve is in full on panic mode and has taken over all the cooking, he is running around like a headless chicken but he means well. 

I walked Beano at 8 this morning and got home to find Steve putting his shoes on and ready to run out the door to look for me. We've since walked Beano twice more, once to the woods and once to Tesco for a wholemeal loaf.

Cass has just dropped off the last few boxes so in the morning I will go through them and hunt for my blood pressure  monitor and re-pack the boxes ready to move.

Friday 28 October 2022


I was released this evening, I've been prescribed medication for all the ills I didn't know I had but nothing for the double vision that is still plaguing me.

Hey ho, Beano is delighted to have me back.

Thursday 27 October 2022


I only slept from 2 until 4 on Wednesday night, last night  was better, I slept from 12 until 4 this morning. I could do with a snooze now but the ward is waking up, I've had my blood pressure taken, I've finally managed to persuade the staff to use the larger cuff and now both numbers are under 250. I've had my finger stabbed and my blood sugar is ok. I was made to sit up as my pulse was so low. These are all my normal, the thing is, I know me so when I say I need a bigger cuff, that means I need a bigger cuff. But it takes a few days of me reiterating this and the staff poo-pooing what I say until everything gets sorted.

I could do with a snooze now whilst it's quiet and the woman opposite has stopped trying to climb out of bed and setting her alarms off but breakfast is on its way and I'm hungry and don't want to miss it.

Let Me Out

I'm currently in hospital, what a palava, I'm hoping to be released tomorrow.

I tried to make an appointment at the Dr's, they refused to see me and insisted I made an opticians appointment.

 The optician sent me straight to Eye Casualty, I arrived just after 11 o'clock in the morning, I got shunted from pillar to post until I finally arrived in acute medical, they insisted I was admitted because my BP was high. Hardly surprising since  I'd been there for 8 hours!

We also have some good news, we should be completing on our flat at the beginning of next week. Is been very stressful as our solicitor disappeared for ages and was ignoring all calls and emails. Yesterday he suddenly reappeared with the completed paperwork.

Tuesday 25 October 2022

Give me strength!

Steve went to bed at 9, I went to bed at 10 as I was tired.

I always stay up at least an hour after Steve goes to bed as its like sleeping on a trampoline.

Steve tosses and turns, bounces and twitches, he is so restless it I end up feeling quite sea sick.

I'm hoping to buy a divan bed when we move as it might be a little more stable.

Mind you I'm beginning to wonder if we will ever move, our solicitor has disappeared and isn't answering our calls.

Saturday 22 October 2022

I think I'm alone now!

 Bob finally arrived just before 11 o'clock as he got lost!

Steve spends a lot of time telling me how wonderful Bob is because he knows I have a pretty low opinion of him.

I replied that racing motorbikes was the reason Bob got lost, he spends most of his time going in circles!

I took Beano out for his second walk and left them chatting, they had gone by the time I arrived home.

I have  a pan of veg soup simmering on the stove, it will do me today and tomorrow, the men will be back at some point tomorrow and I've promised them a Sunday roast, lamb and chicken I think is what I'll do.

The landlord popped round a few minutes ago to say they were away for half term, I'm glad he didn't say anything before Steve left as Steve would have refused to have gone away with Bob.

He is convinced I cannot manage alone and whilst it's challenging as I have such bad double vision it's not impossible.

I shall be so glad when we finally get in to our own flat.

Friday 21 October 2022

Another rainy day.

Steve may go away tomorrow, I hope the weather is better for him.

It limits the walks for Beano as there are some places I won't walk alone in case I fall.

I shall make vegetable soup and eat scrambled eggs whilst I'm alone.

The solicitor is still playing least in site, Steve is still grumpy, I'm looking forward to some peace.

It's half term next week so I'm hoping to see the grandchildren.

Steve walked to the village today to get some cash from the bank, he bought me back an iced bun and a card of hair clips. We ordered some hair clips from Tesco's but they weren't available. They help to hold my eye patch in place as it tends to slip off.

Steve is thinking of buying a TV once we've moved, it might be nice to have one I suppose, it's been a few years that we haven't had one.  Mind you I'm not convinced I'll be able to see it even if we do get one.

Thursday 20 October 2022

Rainy day

Steve and Beano both hate the rain and neither want to go out in it.

I put Beano on the lead at 8:30 and walked him in to the front garden for a widdle, he looked completely dejected but he did comply.

At 10 o'clock we had a Tesco delivery, some of the drivers remember us from the marina which means Steve can chat to them about the why's and wherefore' s of what made us decide to leave.

There was a brief break in the rain so we took Beano out for a very short walk, it was wet underfoot so Beano was keen to return home. I've never had a dog before who hated the rain.

I bought enough stuff to make some soup for my lunches, Steve won't eat home made soup, only Knorr. I don't usually follow a recipe, it's a case of  chuck in a load of veg  and add some lentils. 

Steve may go away for the weekend with a friend, I hope he does, I think we both could do with a break.

Still no word from the solicitors, very tedious, I'm very keen to get moved in and settled especially as my eyesight is deteriorating so fast. 

 At least there is a pelican crossing nearby which will be a great improvement on the current situation. Which is a case of fingers crossed and run. I also have a walking trolley if I'm very unsteady on my feet. if don't use it currently as there is a very steep curb to navigate .

I do apologise for the total boredom of my posts but as I go nowhere and see no one it is difficult to know what to write about.

Wednesday 19 October 2022

Pissed off here.

 Still no audiology appointment.

Still got double vision, appointment next week but not expecting any help.

Still no moving date as the solicitor seems to have disappeared.

Poor DD2 is run ragged sorting everything out.

Steve is going away next weekend with friends.

I will look into getting help once we've moved, thank you, Lincolnshire exile.

Friday 14 October 2022

This is tedious now.

Sally, I will set it up once we get into our flat but I can't until I have a proper address. We are living in a cottage in someone's back garden. Tesco's can find us, but not the postman.

I have to stick to the local chemist until we move , since Covid many chemists seem to be in turmoil.

Jennie has spent the last three weeks trying to get hold of our solicitor for an update, no wonder things are taking so long.

As my eyesight fails I'm getting desperate to get into our flat and get settled.

I need to learn the route for Beano's walks and to the shops whilst I can still see.

Thursday 13 October 2022

Something the cat dragged in!

That's what I feel like this morning!

Hi Pollyanna, so glad you found me.

Yesterday we walked to the chemist, it's a hard walk, we live at the top of one hill, the chemist  is at the top of another hill. We wanted to collect a prescription for Steve, it took hours. Not because we walk slow but the chemist is so disorganised. The prescriptions are kept in so many different boxes and the boxes are stored in different rooms. That's if your prescription is even ready, it often isn't available even if they have emailed to say it is.

It took us almost three hours in total, even Beano was knackered by the time we got home, he didn't want another walk, he slept most of the afternoon.

The sum total of today's activities will be putting the shopping away when it arrives and changing the sheets.

Tuesday 11 October 2022


The boxes from DD1's shed have been repacked and are now taking up a lot less room, they are in the corner of one room.

I have got my walking shoes back and some clothes, Steve wasn't happy with me adding clothes to my wardrobe but tough. I've packed away my two summer dresses and put three winter tops in my wardrobe. I don't have a very extensive wardrobe and although I'm fat, I'm the same size fat I've been for at least ten years.

I will let DD1 know the boxes have all been sorted so she can bring the rest over when she has time.

We've done an online shop for this week, I'm gradually chipping away at the total. Steve will insist on buying brand names, so I delete them and add own brand in its place. We still have some steak in the freezer, so I suggested some cheaper meals and he accepted them.

Sunday 9 October 2022

More stuff

Our little cottage is full of boxes, DD1's shed was on the verge of collapse so she has emptied it and bought our boxes over to us. There are some in the living area and some in the bedroom.

I haven't started unpacking them yet as I need some empty boxes to put the stuff in.

Steve bought boxes when we were getting ready to leave the boat but he bought huge ones. I couldn't lift them when they were full and Steve got cross when I sealed them up half full. The boxes were so big many of them collapsed and were destroyed whilst being moved.

He's now ordered some smaller ones and they should arrive at Jennie's tomorrow. I shall be there to take care of the children before and after school. I shall bring the boxes home with me and start packing them on Tuesday.

I shall get things packed properly and move some stuff into the cupboards here. I may pack up stuff from here into boxes, as the cupboards were pretty full when we arrived but not with stuff we'd use, for example I don't need four full and two part dinner services. So I may pack away some stuff belonging to the cottage so as there is room for our stuff in the cupboards.

No doubt I'll start packing and our move will materialise. I don't care, anything I sort now is less to do when we do move.

Saturday 8 October 2022

Running away to the circus!

Or should I say staggering in the general direction!

There was a circus on the village green where my oldest daughter lives so she took me along. It was a very small circus but great fun. There were ladies in spangly outfits a ringmaster, three clowns and a lady on a bike high in the air.

I had a lovely time, poor little Teddy who is 7 wasn't feeling well so he had lots of cuddles. I haven't seen Arnie the dog for a long time either so he had lots of cuddles too.

Steve decided not to come as he's not keen on the circus so he stayed home to look after Beano.

It was cheap and cheerful and such good fun.

Friday 7 October 2022


We paid the rent again today, there is still no news on our completion date.

Tomorrow I'm going to the circus with DD1 and her family, Beano will stay home with Steve.

Monday I'm spending the day at DD2's as she is out and needs someone to be there when the girls get home.

Explanation for Marlane

 I use a large magnifier to enable me to see words on the screen. I am not blind yet, I just have visual disturbance. I hope this helps.

Thursday 6 October 2022

Thank you

Thanks for all the comments.

I'm reluctant to put a tension pole up in case I mark the wall. It would also mean buying 2 sets of curtains that won't fit anywhere in our next place.

Property is at such a premium in this area that I cannot find anywhere that will allow a short term let, most places insist on a  1 to 2 year let. Also they would not allow me to keep Beano.

Col, if I demand to be allowed to put curtains up I'm pretty sure I'd be asked to leave as there are other people waiting to move in here.

Ellen I can't see the audiology dept providing cochlea implants, but I will ask at my next appointment.I

I hope I've answered all your comments, I apologise if I've missed any.

Macular traction and vestibular schwanoma.

I have Macular traction, this is where the macular becomes misshapen and it gets stuck. This causes distorted vision. It can be released by surgery which allows the macular to regain its correct shape and the vision improves. I have macular traction, not macular degeneration which is a different problem. I had surgery to release the traction in my left eye, it failed, it cannot be done again. I then developed the same traction in my right eye. I wasn't offered the surgery this time. I wouldn't have accepted it if I had. I am not blind, I have some very distorted, blurred vision. Nothing more can be done.

I think I have vestibular schwanoma, it is a form of tumour. I was diagnosed by an audiologist who was overruled by a more senior audiologist. The senior audiologist explained that vestibular schwanoma was not diagnosed at my age as surgery would be too expensive.

So I'm losing my eyesight and my hearing, I'm desperate to hang on to my hearing as being deaf is very isolating. I understand that is hard work trying to communicate with a deaf person. Steve has very little patience with me so most of our interactions are short questions. Am I hot or cold, what times tea, etc. Steve is particularly difficult to understand, I used to rely on lip reading but he covers his mouth with his hands or talks to me without facing me. He gets irritable if I remind him so I don't usually bother. I can't follow conversations in noisy places, I can't follow children's conversations as they are too high pitched, so I miss my grandchildren a lot. I'm hoping to access some help when we get in to our f!at, but I don't hold out much hope.

Wednesday 5 October 2022

An update

The weather is turning chilly and damp, it's overcast today and windy. I think the cottage is going to get very cold over winter as the landlord has decided against putting curtains up.

My daughter is keeping on the solicitors case with regards to our flat but it is having little effect. The holdup is with the company that owns the flats and they are in no rush to complete.

We are paying £1200 a month rent, it's a fair rent for what we have, a bedroom, bathroom and an all in one lounge,kitchen, diner. We cannot rent on the open market as we have no history and we'd need to rent for a one year minimum. We were paying the same for the bedsit above the garage but I really struggled with the stairs there as there was no banister and they were quite steep.

Obviously we'd like to move as soon as possible as every month we stay here is eating into our savings. Mind you, if we'd stayed on the boat we'd be in a worse fix. The mooring fees have skyrocketed, a friend of Steve's phoned him last week, his mooring fees went from £299 pcm to £659 which is a hell of jump.

I've asked for her another referral to the audiology dept. The last one didn't materialise. Jennie phoned on my behalf, to start with she was told I should just "put up and shut up". At my age I needed to realise that bits of me aren't going to work as they did.

Unfortunately my eyesight was damaged by an attempt to repair the macular traction, that eye is now irretrievably damaged. The other eye has developed the same problem but I don't fancy letting the surgeons having another go! 

So I rely on my hearing which has deteriorated recently, one audiologist suggested a reason, vestibular schwanoma. This was some years ago but nothing was done. The head audiologist informed me that treatment wasn't available at my age. They don't want to waste money on someone who is too old to make a useful contribution to life!

And so I battle on, pissed off and battle scarred.

Monday 3 October 2022

Evening all.

 Another long gap between posts, I'm really sorry.

I'm really struggling to think of something to write about.

Heaven knows how long it will be before we can get into our flat.

The place we are staying is lovely but it's incredibly expensive and the rent is eating into the money we have to get things done on our flat.

Saturday 24 September 2022

Its lovely here

But I can't wait to move.  Steve isn't coping well with the change. He's now insisting on eating more junk food. His mum was a lovely lady but an appalling cook. Steve was bought up on toast and shop bought food and as his anxiety gets worse so he refuses home cooked food. I don't like ready made food, I prefer home made. Also I think home made is healthier.

My mother could cook but had no interest in it. I ate school dinners, my parents ate at their works canteen. Once I  had a home of my own and children I learned to cook. I'm gradually improving my diet but Steve's is deteriorating. I'm not pushing water up hill though, if he wants to live on junk he can.

We have finally persuaded the heating system to work, though as the weather has warmed up a bit now we aren't using it. The landlord still doesn't want to fit curtains but then as it's their bill, I'm not too worried.

I'm still making plans for when we eventually move as I think the weather will be at it's worse by then.

Wednesday 21 September 2022

It's chi!ly this evening.

We bought three blankets with us but we are using two of  them to protect the furniture from Beano. There is no carpet in the main room so Beano is allowed on the sofa.

The other blanket is on our bed on top of the duvet to add a layer of warmth, Beano sleeps on top of the duvet and underneath the blanket as it gets cold at night.

There is heating in the bathroom and bedroom, it comes on in the morning from 5:30 until 7:30 just couple of hours but it doesn't come on in the evenings.

The radiators in the main room don't seem to come on at all so we wrap up warm. There are no curtains in the main room, the owners haven't decided whether to fit any yet, so there are no curtains fixings. I could buy some extending poles but I'd then have to buy curtains that probably won't fit our next flat.

Steve is thinking of going into town tomorrow to buy new trousers and some slippers as he's finding the laminate floor chilly, I have a pair of bootie slippers so my feet are toasty warm.

I've given up trying to explain to Steve that he's wasting money on Nurofen, it goes in one ear and out the other, he is the same with toothpaste and lots of food. I get as much unbranded stuff as I can, I just don't let him know.

I finally got round to doing some cooking, some home made soup, broccoli and cheese, I only made a small panful as I'm the only one that will eat it. Since his stroke Steve will mainly eat shop bought, packet food and I don't like it so I'm making more effort for myself. I ordered ingredients in this weeks shop and nothing ready-made for me.

Tuesday 20 September 2022

Another trip to the village.

Steve decided we'd go into the village today as he needed some neurofen, he's a real brand snob, no paracetamol or ibuprofen for him, it has to be something with a name!

He claims to need  it for his backache, he's spent the last three days in bed so no wonder he's got backache!

I bought milk and broccoli and from a charity shop I bought three small glass bowl as there are none in the cottage. Steve bought his tablets and then we walked home again, Beano enjoyed the walk. It was a couple of miles,  longer on the way there as Steve to one of his magic shortcuts.

I'm hoping to cook roast beef later as its been in the fridge since Sunday.

Friday 16 September 2022

Flu jab

Steve and I went for our covid jabs today, I've lost track of how many we've had now, all that were offered, certainly.

I chose to have a flu jab at the same time, I don't usually bother as I'm not particularly susceptible to the flu virus. I had flu once when I was in my teens and it thoroughly ruined a dirty weekend!

We left here at 12 as although it's only a mile to the surgery, the entire journey is down a very steep hill and up another steep hill. We could have caught two buses but it seemed pointless to do that, so we walked and took Beano with us. We arrived with loads of time to spare but because we had Beano with us, we had to go in separately so the whole thing took a while.

We then walked back and had lunch, Steve had a ham sandwich and I had a bagel with hummus.

Thank you for all the information you have sent me I am very grateful and I'm working my way through it.

Wednesday 14 September 2022

Life in limbo

 There is still no news on our flat purchase, every month we stay here is eating in to our savings.

Thank you for all your kind comments, Steve seems to feel much better here than he did on the boat, life is easier for both of us.

Flis, I'm sorry to hear about Lily.

Thank you to the unknown poster who has posted the RNIB information.

Thank you to Angela who has listed information about benefits that may be available, I'm already 70 though Steve is younger, so I will look into claiming as soon as we are in our flat.

Debdor, it seems to depend on where you live, the hospital I come under has retirement age as the cut off point.

John I will look into it once we are settled, we do not have an address at the moment as we are in an Airbnb until our flat purchase goes through.

Lyssa thank you for your kind comments.

And on to the Queen, I'm not a royalist but apart from that I will keep my opinions to myself, I would no more queue to see her than I would fly.

I walked a bit too far today, Beano's walks have been shorter recently as one of my toes is giving me grief, I'm sure it will settle down soon. Beano can easily walk 4 or 5 miles but I'm currently struggling to walk 2 miles, nemmind it's the joys of getting old.

Thursday 8 September 2022

Nothing happening.

We are still having some sunny days but at least we are having some rain too. The grass is turning green and soft instead of being brown and crispy. Beano is happier, his skin is better and not so irritated. He won't take the tablets he was prescribed and he licks off  any cream applied. He improves when the temperature reduces.

I'm getting used to my air fryer and using it in preference to the oven in the cottage. I prefer to cook on gas but it isn't an option here, nor is it an option in the flat when we eventually get there.

Jennie bought some more property purchase paperwork over y'day but everything is taking an age. Partly because there's a threeway lease involved and partly a hangover from Covid.

I'm sure we'll get there eventually but I'm worried about my eyesight by the time we get moved in. I need to master the route out of the complex before I cannot see.

I'm also hoping to find things to join once we move as the bus stop is nearby, as is a park where I can walk Beano. Steve sometimes complains that we gave up the boat for no reason as I'm no better off here than I was on the boat. But at least here my family know where I am and they do visit regularly. I'm seeing the same dog walkers every day and chatting to them too.

I'm quite concerned about my eyesight along with my hearing which is also failing. I know nothing can be done about my macular traction, it was trying to repair it that caused the problem I have now. My hearing problems are caused by vestibular schwanoma but the audiology department of our local hospital won't treat in patients of my age, only people of working age are treated. I can't say I'm enthusiastic about going both blind and deaf!I

I'm hoping once we move I can access more help.

Saturday 3 September 2022

A bad night.

 I'm not sleeping well, something is disturbing Beano at around 3am and again at 5 am and he's barking a lot.

He's not usually much of a barker, just an occasional woof if someone comes to the door.

But he's barking a lot at whatever is disturbing him, I'm assuming it's a deer or badger. He doesn't bark much at cats or foxes.

I'm considering letting him out when he barks in an attempt to dissuade whatever it is from visiting every night.

He won't chase anything that is in the garden so neither he or the nocturnal visitor are in danger. But I really cannot manage if I'm to be disturbed every night.

Wednesday 31 August 2022


We are due some rain on Friday, the garden could really do with some. Steve  is watering the landlords garden every evening for him. I think they are due back on Friday.

I'm thinking of buying some blankets, the heating costs here are included in the rent but I don't want to run up a massive bill for the landlord. There are no curtains in the cottage so I'm a bit  worried about keeping warm.

Any blankets will come in useful in our new place too as we'll need the heating on less if we keep ourselves warm.

Monday 29 August 2022

It's the little things.

A phone call from DD2 y'day morning, it's Reading Festival weekend here, she had taken her four children to the Festival every day but on the last day, her youngest Jojo was wiped out by the late nights and ask if she could stay with Nana and Steve.

We were delighted to have her come over, she was very quiet for the first hour but after a dinner of roast beef, roast potatoes, goodies and get she perked up no end.

It was so lovely to spend time with her she is an absolute joy.

Friday 26 August 2022

Air fryer

 I've had my air fryer for a week but only got some baking parchment y'day. 

Yesterday I cooked some Cajun chicken in it, it was very successful.

Today is Friday, Steve has chicken and ribs on Friday, without fail!

They are pre cooked so only need heating up, the air fryer worked perfectly but Steve complained because I heated up the chicken first whereas he wanted the ribs first

All in all I'm very pleased with the air fryer so far, I have a gammon joint cooking in it at the moment.

Regaining myself.

I'm gradually recovering, Steve is finding it difficult.

He is convinced he was well enough to continue boat life, I was there, he wasn't!

He was finding life difficult and relied on me a lot, mainly for things I couldn't do, which gave him and excuse to moan.

We had four visitors yesterday, 

Chris who bought over two boxes that he's had in his car since we left the marina.

Rivers who arrived with some baking parchment that Jennie had purchased for me, this meant I could start using my air fryer.

Steve's friend Bob who had a job to do in Wokingham, he dropped by for coffee.

Jennie, who had dropped Rivers off at Reading Festival and was giving us a lift to the marina to sign some paperwork.

All in all a busy day as most days we see no-one.

This morning Steve has gone into town on the bus, allegedly it's to get me some Vit C tablets, actually it's to go to the pub and have lunch.

I'm going to vacuum the floor as I've been managing with a brush since we moved here.

I'm going to cook a gammon joint in my air fryer and try and decide what to make with the apples I've  collected.

I also need to work out a meal plan, Steve is becoming more and more limited on what he will eat and I'm determined to improve my diet.

Wednesday 24 August 2022


I've tried to persuade him to join something but unfortunately he deems everyone else an idiot, so he refuses to join anything!

Wiped out

 I'm still feeling wiped out but I am improving slowly.

Steve still wants to move somewhere different!

Nowhere in particular, just somewhere different.

When I decided I'd had enough of living in the boat I gave him the option of staying, he chose not to!

Yes, money will be tight when we move but money has been tight before.

I'm entitled to claim more benefit which I will do once we've moved.

I will go back to shopping at Aldi and Lidl once we're settled too.

I really hope we can make a go of it.

Sunday 21 August 2022

Catch up post.

The flat is just new to us Sue, it's in a listed building though out part isn't listed.

Steve has now decided he wants to buy a different flat, probably just because!

Or maybe we should rent a flat instead!

I'm sticking to my guns, I've spent a year longer than I should have living on a boat, trying to explain that was no longer coping.

I need some quality of life, some company and regular contact with my family.

Friday 19 August 2022


The boat has been sold and tomorrow it will set off up the Thames to its new home.

We eventually reached an amicable agreement with the new owner and they have paid for the boat so they can set off tomorrow.

The surveyor caused a few problems as he claimed a few items were broken whereas they were simply turned off as the boat was moored up.

However everything was eventually sorted and the new owner paid their money and took possession.

All we have to do now is wait for our new flat to be ready.

Wednesday 17 August 2022

Bloody cheek.

 I received an email today from Joe at the dry dock, he wanted to know when we were going to pay him for the work he's done!

It seems our prospective purchaser told him we were paying for the survey and the blacking.

Nothing is ever straightforward is it, we've spoken to the broker who is going to try and sort it all out for us.

Tuesday 16 August 2022

Sunday 14 August 2022


I went to Specsavers originally as I wanted my hearing aids to have Bluetooth and RBH audiology wouldn't provide me with Bluetooth as I was past working age.

The Royal Berks audiologist diagnosed my vestibular schwanoma but he was overruled by a senior audiologist who claimed (without examining me) that I had blocked eustachian tubes, because they don't diagnose  vestibular schwanoma in patients over 60 years of age.

My Dr has tried to make me an appointment with audiology but has been unsuccessful. So I'm stuck with what I've got.

I am also going blind, so I plod on with what I've got and try to make the best of things.

Saturday 13 August 2022

Settling in.

I went to Specsavers to get my hearing aids checked, there is nothing wrong with them so my hearing is deteriorating quite fast. I've already been told that they don't treat vestibular schwanoma in people of my age, so that's that then!

The Specsavers I went to is in a supermarket so I did some shopping, mainly kitchen utensils, fortunately there was a range of items available from £1 each so not too expensive. The flat is very well provisioned with crockery and cutlery by there is a shortage of kitchenware.

I'm sitting in the garden with Beano where it is a little cooler than indoors.

I have a Tesco delivery on Monday so I'll be well stocked then and now I no longer have a car a delivery is the best that ng.

I'm sitting outside in the garden as its cooler now, Beano is asleep at my feet, we are doing our best to keep him comfortable.

He is currently on the lead as the homeowners parents are staying and they own two small dogs, one of them isn't very friendly. He's not keen on being on the lead but it's only until Monday when the family set off on holiday.

They are away for two weeks we have offered to water the garden for them, assuming there isn't a hose pipe ban in place by then.

Wednesday 10 August 2022

Lazy day

 Steve went off yesterday to the boat, he had to move it this morning at 8am. I've had a couple of messages from him keeping me updated. He assumed he'd be on the boat for at least a week but has just confirmed that he'll be back this evening between 6 & 7. He wanted to stay on the boat until it was surveyed but that obviously wasn't feasible. I expect he will be wiped out by the time he gets home.

I've spent most of today either sitting on the sofa or snoozing in bed, I'm totally wiped out. It's probably a combination of the stress of moving so many times in just a few days, the heat and coping with Steve.

Sunday 7 August 2022

A few weeks respite

I couldn't cope with the steep stairs in the first Airbnb so we have moved to a different one. This one is also a one bed but it's a renovated barn and it's huge, also We can have Beano with us, I was missing him badly.

It's costing us an arm and a leg but anything cheaper is too far away from Jennie and as she is doing out flat purchase for us we need to be near her.

We can stay here until mid December so I hope we can complete on our flat before then.

Monday 1 August 2022

Friday 22 July 2022

Sitting in the corner gibbering quietly

I have 8 boxes packed and awaiting collection.

Cass has covid and can't collect our boxes.

Steve's in a strop as its very inconvenient of Cass to be ill!

He is very stressed and totally self centred, my girls are bending over backwards to help but nothing is good enough and I'm permanently on the verge of a panic attack.

Thursday 21 July 2022

Cooler now

And a lot more comfortable.

Steve was out most of the day, he went to collect his prescription, I ordered it last week, it should have been ready to collect on Tuesday. It still wasn't ready this morning so Steve went across to the nearest Costa to have coffee whilst he waited for his prescription. 

He then went into town for his breakfast and then on to the view the flat we are renting for a few weeks until our flat purchase is completed.

I packed more boxes ready for them to go into storage until we move into out flat.

Saturday 16 July 2022

It aint half hot

It's far too hot to pack, but pack I must.

Steve has decided he doesn't want to move with mismatched boxes so he bought 50 huge matching packing boxes.

I don't care, I'll pack in anything.

I just want it done and dusted.

Friday 15 July 2022

I have lots to do.

 I have zero inclination to make a start!

I also  have very little time to achieve anything.

Steve is mainly panicking and managing to achieve nothing.

We need to be off the boat by 10th July as its going in for a survey and blacking. Steve wants to stay aboard to protect the boat from thieves but it will be in a secure compound. I can't stay aboard as the boat will need to be accessed by a ladder which neither Beano or I can manage.

I'm looking for a serviced apartment to rent until our new place is ready. Steve is going to rent a three bed house or a hot air balloon or move in with a passing mermaid! It's still under discussion.

I may have lost my marbles by the time it's all sorted!

Wednesday 13 July 2022

Next step.

 We've received and accepted an offer on the boat, we have a survey booked for it on 12 th August.

Monday 11 July 2022


It's taken a while but Steve has finally accepted albeit reluctantly, that I cannot continue living on the boat.

I know he's desperately disappointed but he doesn't want to live alone and I wouldn't be safe on the boat.

I have suggested various places we could have moved the boat to but none have met with his approval.

Steve is going to work with Bob tomorrow, Bob rarely does hard physical labour and Steve hasn't done any for years, I think they will both be  knackered by tomorrow evening.

Thursday 7 July 2022

Closing the curtains.

 I remembered to close the curtains last night so I didn't get woken up by Beano barking at the security patrols.  

Let's hope I can stay awake today as I slept twice yesterday during the day.

Beano is suffering in the heat, I may give him a shower today even though it's something he hates. The poor boy is so itchy that I feel it could do him some good, especially as I use a special shampoo on him.

Please don't worry, we're  looking at housing where dogs are allowed, we won't buy anything where he isn't welcome.

My daughter is having to help us, she is making phone calls and driving us around. We're very grateful as neither of us can drive now.

Wednesday 6 July 2022

Photo's today

 I have boxes to put things in, furniture to move and floors to wash, the boat is being photographed today ready to be advertised online.

I need to persuade Steve that packs of bungee cords and other gibble are not decorative and need to be put away.

Ah well, onwards and forwards.

Cleaning and scrubbing

Apologies, I attempted to delete an nasty comment yesterday and  managed to delete all the comments on my blog, I'll try not to do it again.

I've been busy cleaning and scrubbing today, the kitchen floor is a bugger to clean, in an effort to ensure it is non-slip the floor is tiled in non-slip tiles. Nice and safe but a bugger to clean.

We are viewing a property tomorrow, hopefully it will suit us, it has a beautiful garden and a meeting room.

We're bashing on with the cleaning again tomorrow and Friday,  it's exhausting especially as its so humid today.

Sunday 3 July 2022

For Sale

The boat goes on the market tomorrow.

We had two viewings today. 

I'm looking at a flat tomorrow.

I'm knackered!

Saturday 2 July 2022


We arrived at the marina, Steve eventually realised I needed power so he plugged us in to shore power.

We had a phone call from someone who wants to look at our boat, but I need to clean it first, they are coming over tomorrow morning!

Jennie rang to see  if I needed a lift to the supermarket, I jumped at the chance as I'm out of so many things.

I still need to clean the boat!

We've made it!

We are back in the marina, I've walked Beano, Steve has told anyone who will listen and a few who wouldn't that I'm not well and he's turning his life upside down in his efforts to help me!

Unfortunately I seem to have missed his efforts, I've asked him to plug the boat in to shore power as our alternator is buggered, but he wont. I need to start the water heater, run the washing machine and vacuum through. I can do none of these without shore power!

I think I'll go back to bed!


Friday 1 July 2022

The time has come!

We've had a phone call from the marina manager to say we can return.

We are calling it a day and putting the boat on the market.

I need to get the boat cleaned, it's beyond me at the moment.

I'm hoping to find someone to do it but if all else fails Cass has a friend who will do it.

Tuesday 28 June 2022


 It is raining here this morning but is supposed to stop in a couple of hours.

Rivers is coming over to help us and we are moving back towards the marina.

Steve was meant to phone the manager to see if there is room for us but he's not done so yet, I'll do it later today if he still hasn't. I'm sure they will make room for us when they know we are selling up and if  not then  the other marina nearby will. 

I think Steve has realised that we cannot afford to buy a three bed house and anyway I don't want anything that big. I want something small and easy to take care of.

All change.

 That's it, life on the cut is coming to an end.

The boat is going on the market and we need to move into a flat.

Sunday 26 June 2022

Doctor's appointment today

Just for a blood test, Jennie is taking me and I'm taking Beano with me. 

Not really very convenient but there is no way Steve will cope with him.

I wonder how many people are dying because they can't get a Drs appointment.

Before I lost my hearing I would have insisted on an appointment. My attitude has always been that I so rarely ask for an appointment that I should get on when need one. With poor hearing, everything is such a struggle.

Saturday 25 June 2022


I have felt very foggy and thick headed but my brain is gradually clearing as the antibiotics start to work. 

I have known for a while that a life of isolation doesn't suit me, I just about coped when I had a car  but now I'm carless it's getting more difficult.

I need to make changes whilst I still can and whilst I still have some eyesight and hearing left.

I hadn't realised how badly Steve has been affected until this trip, he's barely coping so I need to make changes.

I shall make plans and see how Steve feels about making changes.

My blood pressure is through the roof as Steve is taking it multiple times a day. He was the same just after he had his stroke he kept taking his own blood pressure and panicking about the readings. My problem is my fat arms, my bingo wings are covered in small bruises where Steve has been taking readings multiple times a day!

I shall start making plans. Today's plan is to fill up with fuel and water and head back to the marina.

Thursday 23 June 2022


DD2 must have played merry hell at the Dr's surgery as she got me an appointment at 6 o'clock which is after they shut.

She came in with me as I can't hear at the moment and I'm was very confused. She now has permission to deal with the Dr as I was finding it all such a struggle.

I'm now on antibiotics and the fog is clearing, Steve is doing his headless chicken act and we are returning to the marina.

Rivers is coming along to help.

Moving day

On Tuesday we moved from Burghfield to Pangbourne. 

Rivers came along and did the locks with me, we did seven and I'm knackered now. 

Steve's friend Bob came along, met us at  Caversham and came to Pangbourne with us, I barely spoke to him as I felt awful. He is used to me being a better hostess.

Steve kept complaining because Beano and  I wouldnt sit outside, it was far too hot. Steve loves the sun but me? Not so much.

Saturday 18 June 2022


So anonymous doesn't like my posts even though he/she has been following me for years. Simple answer, bugger off and stop following me if I'm boring you.

That's what I do if I'm following a blog and it changes direction to something in not interested in I stop following it.

DD2 is trying to get me an appointment at the Dr's, she's worried about my mobility declining along with my vocabulary. They could both affected by lack of use but I think my social isolation could affect my vocabulary. Steve stopped wearing his hearing aids a few weeks ago, claiming they were hurting his ears. I gave up speaking to him as I was having to shout everything. I don't see anyone else to talk to apart from DD2. She has taken me shopping since we left the marina but from next week Steve will take over the shopping again.

I also need an audiology appointment, either my aids are failing or my ears are and I need to find out which. I'm pretty sure it's the vestibular schwanoma causing the problem but in my area they are not diagnosed in older people.

My eyesight has stopped changing and seems to have settled down, I'm no longer nauseous but my vision has declined. I can't get glasses, I've tried two or three opticians but with no luck.

So I apologise for moaning but having a cluster of medical problems at once is a bit inconvenient. I'm sadly lacking things to keep me entertained, I can watch a couple of tv programmes a week, Who do you think you are, and Sewing Bee. 

I knit but only with large needles and super bulky yarn and only for about half an hour.. I can't listen to the radio which is a shame, I miss listening to music and plays. But I find everything sounds so distorted, with tv I can have large subtitles up on screen.

On Monday we will visit the nearby pub for an Anniversary Meal, hopefully DD2 & DGS will come too.

We are still waiting to find out of we will have a place in the marina this winter as they are having building work done.

I need to try to sleep now so I must turn my light out

Thursday 16 June 2022

Moving on.

We moved on again today, four locks and a bridge and then we stopped.

DD2 is collecting me tomorrow and taking me shopping.

Hopefully we can have a peaceful few days.

I'm hoping to recover, I was wiped out today and went to bed as soon as we moored up.

Wednesday 15 June 2022

Keep buggering on.

Rambler, he's not listening to me currently, I'm playing it by ear. If he gets really unsafe I will abandon ship and leave him to cope alone.

Ellen, I don't get a break unless you count my occasional trips to the supermarket and he's trying to organise more deliveries and less trips.

Steve has an audiology appointment today at 4:30, hopefully he'll get his hearing aids repaired. It's proving tedious having to repeat everything 4 or 5 times because he can't hear me.

Unfortunately if I can't hear him it's my fault, if he can't hear me it's also my fault, though this seems to be very common amongst the men on the cut.

I'm hoping to see DD2 at least one more time before we get to the Thames, I've not managed to see anyone else apart from one boaters wife for some time now.

Tuesday 14 June 2022

Not dead yet

Morning all.

I'm still around, still wobbly and the Wi-Fi here is pretty ropey.

I've managed some knitting, it's a super bulky yarn so fairly easy to knit with.

Steve's adamant we are going on the Thames, I can see it being fraught with problems, if we get stuck I shall abandon ship and leave him to it.

Thursday 9 June 2022

No second opinion

 Hi Debby.

No there is no second opinion, I have Macular traction, the surgery failed.

I just have to live with what is left.

Wednesday 8 June 2022


Jaccs, there is nothing that can be done, apart from surgery which they won't do as it failed last time. I don't think I could face it again. The waiting room was rammed from the start as everyone had an 8:30 am appointment. Older patients arrived constantly throughout the day as did tiny newborn babies. My surgery was put back and put back until there was just me left. By the time I went in the surgeon must have been exhausted as it was about 6:30.  He knew what had happened as he swore, he blamed me and claimed I'd moved. I was warned that there was a chance the surgery would fail and it did. This was some years ago now.

I don't wear glasses I've been told I'm not a suitable case for treatment and I doubt I could afford glasses even if they were available as they would be a very complicated prescription.

Sunday 5 June 2022


 Jacss asked why my vision has changed.

I have Macular traction. 

This is not the same as Macular degeneration.

It distorts my vision and gets worse with time.

It started in my left eye.

I had surgery on it, it failed!.

I now have traction in my right eye.

I have permanent double vision.

On the day of the surgery I arrived at the hospital at 8:30, 

was seen at 5.30, the last appointment of the day.

I expect the surgeon was tired.

I went back the following day as I couldn't see at all.

After a week my sight started to return, I returned to work.

The surgery caused a cataract.

I have refused to have surgery on the second eye as I wish to save what vision I have.

That was the jubilee weekend!

We didn't see much of the jubilee, Steve's not interested and I couldn't see the bits I wanted as we weren't around at the appropriate times.

The family wedding went well although it was difficult for people to get to the Guildhall in Windsor at the appropriate time. We had to get a lift to the station and then catch three trains each way. Windsor was heaving with crowds because of the jubilee, I'm not convinced my brother in law realised it was the jubilee weekend when he booked the wedding.

Steve hung on to me for grim death whilst we made our way to the Guildhall he's probably more upset at the change in my vision than I am. He seemed to think I was going to disappear in a puff of smoke if he let go of me.

We moored in our usual place in the marina for the weekend and my daughter gave us a lift to the station at just after 12 o'clock. We didn't go to the reception as it was 16 miles away from the Guildhall and with no transport links. The wedding was at 2 o'clock and the reception was at 5 o'clock so we returned home after the ceremony. We were home by 5:30 and that included having a meal in the station pub.

We went to the Three Guineas at Reading station. Steve had Hunters chicken, followed by a choclate brownie, I had Scampi followed by strawberries and cream. It was much better than we expected for a busy pub. 

I'm rapidly adjusting to my changed vision but it's bloody inconvenient.

Lights out again!

Yet again our on-site lights have failed! I'm up and dressed and about to visit our site manager who is due here today. Last time this h...