Seriously unimpressed

My DD1 is 40 today, I sent her a tub of lavender, it wasn't cheap, these things never are.

Despite my delivery instructions stating that the tub was to be left by the front door it was thrown over the back gate!

I shan't order from Bloom and Wild again. They have agreed to a partial refund and DD1 has repotted the lavender but it spoilt what should have been a lovely gift!

Long walk

Three miles is a long walk when you've got short fat hairy legs, Beano thinks so too.

New project

 

I've been given a bag of assorted chunky yarn. I'm making a scarf and hat set with this as I love the colour. Most of the other yarn is in more subtle colours and tweedy looking. With it I'm thinking of making hats and short cravat style scarves as there are only a few balls of each whereas there is a lot of the stuff pictured above.

I have to say that Beano doesn't approve of knitting as he can't sit on my knee when I'm waving  long needles about, he prefers crochet as there is more room for him. This doesn't mean he goes short of cuddles though, he either sits on Steve's knee or I stop knitting!

Beans

We are growing beans and lettuce in troughs on the roof. The bean plans are covered in flowers so I hope we get a good crop.

Hearing aids

 Witch Hazel, my hearing aids are pretty good, there is a definite improvement. I can now hear the grandchildren when they speak to me but I still have problems if there is a lot of background noise. 

The big thing for me is the Bluetooth facility as it enables me to use the phone, listen to music and watch a film without subtitles.

Moving day

We filled the water tanks, emptied the black water and the rubbish before we set off.

We only travelled for about an hour before we moored up.

It's nice here but there's not much solar.

Wedding anniversary

It was our wedding anniversary on Friday, on Saturday we ordered takeaway fish and chips from a nearby pub.

The fish and chips were delicious but what a palava, we went to the pub, spoke to a staff member, who said there was no trace of my order! The implication being I'd obviously done something wrong! I took out my phone and showed her the email I'd received confirming my order.

She went back in to the pub and then returned saying they would make my order up and it would take 15 minutes. I agreed as I'd nothing defrosted ready to cook. Steve went to the bar and bought drinks, almost immediately the staff member returned with our meals. We left our drinks and returned to the boat as we didn't want the fish and chips to get cold. 

I can't believe the staff were able to cook the food that quickly but it was piping hot, the batter was crispy as we're the chips. Were both now full but Steve is still disgruntled that he paid for drinks and we didn't drink them.

Well that's a new one

Thanks for the links Ruth.

 I answered a phone  call today, something I rarely do.

Caller "Am I speaking to Mrs Jo"

Me " No"

Caller "We need to deliver some cash to you today will you be in"

Me "I think you have the wrong number"

Caller "No the cash is definitely for you, I just need to check we have the correct postcode and I need to confirm that you will be in"

Me "Can you swim?

Caller "I don't understand"

Me " I live on a boat, you will have to swim out to deliver the cash"

Dial tone!!!!

Here we go again

It's rained all day today, apart from a brief respite at about 3:30 when I managed to get Beano out for a quick walk.

Because of the rain, the K&A is Red Boarded from Woolhampton to Frouds Bridge and from County Lock to Fobney Lock. I'm hoping we get to move on before we are Red Boarded here.

Our friends set off this afternoon towards Reading  they will be gone for five weeks, we will miss them. I'm on a mission to knit as many scarves and hats in the chunky wool I was given before they return. I shall do a simple rib for the scarves but I need to look for an easy hat pattern to go with them.

Margaret, I have seen Foxes Afloat, Steve watches a lot of narrow boat videos but to me they are a bit "coals to Newcastle" so I watch other stuff.

Thursday

 We had a smattering of rain last night but none of the promised thunder and lightening. 

Still it is cooler so Beano is more comfortable and has had a nice long walk today.

Steve is in a foul mood, probably worrying about the car.

I'm looking for some stashbuster crochet patterns, I'm watching some YouTube videos but some of them aren't very clear.

As it's cooler I've tidied a couple of drawers, cleaned the bathroom, reorganised the freezer and next I'm sweeping,and mopping the rest of the floor. Such an exciting life I lead!

What day is it?

Well I don't know about where you are but here it's been Twaterday!

We had a hire boater shouting at the five boats travelling towards him that they were on the wrong side of the canal, they weren't, he was!

Someone moored on the water point for the entire day, didn't need water and then complained about people running hoses too near his boat.

A woman fell off her boat and couldn't get out of the water, there were seven people on the bank. Three ran about like headless chickens, I shan't say which organisation they were with but they should have known better. One tried to pull her out with bungee cords, two got their phones out to film her and one, the hero of the hour, stepped forward, squatted down, took her hands and stood up slowly allowing her to climb out.

Someone came up to the boat and wittered on for ages about basic 101 dog psychology and how all dogs understand and like him. Meanwhile Beano was growling menacingly!

Security questions updated

Endless  phone calls today, insurance company, car recovery company, repairs company.

Only one question really threw me, now I have Bluetooth hearing aids most people are easy to hear.

But I had to ask for the question to repeated a few times when the person I was speaking to asked Cofer Daya Berr?

No it wasn't a foreign accent just lazy diction, I really couldn't understand her at all. Eventually she said "When were you born?"

 I expect she thought I was stupid!

The full conversation went thus.

 "_I neetask securtquest" 

This translates to I need to ask security questions.

 "Creg?"

 Car reg?

 "Fsline yrades?"

 First line of your address.

"Cofer daya berr?

Confirm your date of birth.

There were no extra comments at all, she did not say, could you tell me, or,  what is your.

She just slurred the necessary questions into as few syllables as possible.

Obviously being a decrepit old fart of almost 70 years of age I found this very confusing and she obviously thought I was stupid.

Moving on

We have moved on again our last mooring was beautiful but there was no phone or Wi-Fi signal.

Where we are now the signal is better, we can stay for 7 days.

I'm currently car less, I walked back to get it this morning to discover it had been badly vandalised.

I'm now waiting to find out the cost of repair this could well be the end of my driving days.

Legal again

My car passed its MOT, it was actually never illegal, I just wanted it done in plenty of time in case there were any issues.

We are bridge hopping our way to Devizes, so when I go anywhere like I did this morning I need to remember the name of the nearest pub or hamlet so I know where to turn off. It's very easy to start driving on automatic pilot and then realising you are heading to the mooring g before last.

It took me an hour I get to the MOT centre, then I got the car washed and went shopping. 

Just a small shop, a piece of lamb shoulder for Sunday lunch and some spring greens to go with it.

Moving day tomorrow, we need water and to empty the black water tank.

Fully paid up.

 I'm now officially a fully paid up member of the Fucarewi movement.

I drive up and down the A4  muttering Where the fuck are we Moored!

Hot, hot, hot

 I did buy two duvets at one point but Steve hated it, no idea why.

So today it's really hot, so what do I decide to do? Make strawberry jam, I must be mad.

Still very poor Wi-Fi signal here so yesterday I repaired a dress, altered a top and did some crochet. Today I'm turning two dresses into tops.

Nipples, toes and how close is too close?

The fuel boat visited today we bought gas and diesel, enough to see us through until he next passed along. He ties up alongside so he can reach. He has a lovely dog called Max, I have Max a cuddle and a bowl of water.

Steve likes the bed clothes folded down to below his nipples.

I like the bedclothes so I can pull them up over my shoulders.

Because of this I sleep so far down the bed that I can hook my toes over the end of the bed.

Under threat

 I'm not sure if this will post, we have moved from an area of no signal at all to an area of occasional signal.

I am under threat of arrest again from HRMC, their agents are on their way unless I press 1. I'm not sure where they are on their way to but hopefully they can meet up with the agents from National Insurance and have a chat whilst they look for me!

I've also been threatened with arrest by the local police, a passing dog walker informed me that she was phoning the police to report the dangerous dog I have on board. She was upset that Beano, who was on the boat behind a baby gate, barked at her dog as it had the temerity to walk up our gang plank. She shouted at me to get a muzzle for Beano, so in a calm and reasonable manner I suggested she should wear a muzzle. She is also reporting me for being a dirty gypsy and using bad language. I shall be annoyed if she wastes police time over this.

Steve is also being threatened but by the DWP, letters and phone calls are still being received with regards to his ESA claim, his benefit will be stopped forthwith as he isn't supplying the documentary evidence they require. That will be because he isn't claiming ESA or anything else for that matter. Every time someone phones, he explains that he isn't making a claim. They apologise and assure him that they will sort it out but a couple of days later and someone else phones with the same questions.