A walk in the park.

I try to ensure Steve joins me for one of Beano's walks every day. He refused for the first few weeks we were here but has started to join me sometimes.

Steve has hurt his back, I'm not sure how bad it really is but he's certainly complaining a lot. Currently he is complaining that I walk too fast when he comes out with me. In between these complaints he tells me how he'd prefer to go on a 10 mile walk. I've suggested he tries a few longer walks but it seems he can't as it would upset Beano.

He is still complaining about where we live and keeps looking at boats to buy. I expect he'll start viewing boats with a view to buying one soon. It will keep him occupied for a while and the marinas will soon cotton on and stop him wasting their time.

Apart from these problems, life goes on as usual.

We have seed trays around the flat with seedlings in, a rose bush waiting until the threat of frost is past and then it can be planted out. I

Steve is watering Harry's next doors plants as he is away for a couple of weeks and we are storing his post too.

I'm going out on Friday with both my daughters and on Monday to a pop up restaurant, Monday's meal is Mediterranean seafood and in aid of a homeless charity.

Beano

We turned the heating off for a few days but we turned it on again when the temperature dropped, it's going to be -2 tonight. We only use the heating in the living room, neither of us likes a warm bedroom.

I'm managing 6000 steps a day it's not much but it's better than nothing.

Steve has started taking an interest in gardening, long may it last, it's better than just sitting in his chair and sulking. I'm trying to get him to walk Beano with me once a day. He spends most of the walk telling me he'd like to walk 10 miles a day, he managed 2000 steps a day when he walks with me.

Tomorrow he's out with a friend and we have a Tesco delivery, Saturday evening I'm going out for a meal with DD1. Life is just one long whirl of excitement.

We've had a visit from a grumpy neighbour, he told me that Beano isn't allowed in the garden. I said that he was. The neighbour informed me that since he'd been here 9 years it was up to him to make the decision and he'd decided that Beano was not to go in the garden. I told him to fcuk off and shut the door on him. I'm happy to abide by the HA rules but not one stroppy resident. Beano doesn't go in the garden, but he will from now on!

Oh the joys of communal living, I'd been warned that this particular resident is a bully, he got short shrift from me.

Sunday

Thank you for all your comments, Steve is irritating but never aggressive. I meant my marriage vows when I made them and for now I stand by them. If Steve were to leave that would be his decision. I wouldn't tolerate any aggression but as I say Steve some times has a rant but these are mostly caused by  Steve's confusion, depression and frustration.

If we split up, we would neither of us would be able to live in comfort, we'd both have to move to a rented bedsit and I'd have to give up Beano which would be heartbreaking.

I've had a few weeks of feeling feak and weeble as my dad used to say but I've had two consecutive good days with no wobbly legs.  My eyesight is deteriorating, I have glasses issued by the hospital to counteract my double vision so I wear them when I walk Beano. I have macular traction in both eyes, surgery failed and left me with incipient cataracts and a split retina. My hearing is failing too but there is nothing that can be done so I keep buggering on.

Aftereffects of having a stroke.

I'm not sure what name is of the particular post stroke syndrome that Steve is suffering from, I know it affects many more men than women but many Dr's claim to have no knowledge of it.

Steve is convinced that I never shower as I always shower between 7 & 8 the morning as soon as I get up. As Steve doesn't get up until around 10/11 o'clock he isn't aware of me showering so has decided I no longer bother.

He has decided he no longer wants me to cook for him as my cooking is shite. I think he was somewhat disappointed with the enthusiasm I greeted this decision. I'm not a fancy cook but years of cooking for a large family means that I'm a perfectly adequate plain cook. Steve did come to regret this decision when he realised how much effort he would have to put into feeding himself. He eats mainly junk food of the 'throw it in the airfryer' variety though he does cook Sunday dinner, meat and potatoes though no veg. Occasionally I'll cook enough for him if he likes what I'm cooking.

I've started wearing nightclothes at Steve's request as the sight of me naked is disgusting, he still sleeps naked as he is obviously still an Adonis. He no longer wants to have sex with me as I'm far too old, but there are certain things he likes me to do but none of these involve him touching me.

I started to attend the afternoon meetings in the summer house to get to know some of the residents. To start with Steve flatly refused as he had no intention of meeting 'a load of old people'. Once he realised I was enjoying having a social life he decided that he would start to attend and that I would need to stay home with Beano. I still regularly attend the quiz morning's on Wednesday's and any afternoons when Steve doesn't go. To be fair, my poor eyesight and hearing make it difficult for me when I do attend the meeting and actually being alone in the flat with just Beano and without the black cloud sitting in the armchair is a joy in itself.

At last

 

The blinds for our window have arrived and been fitted. As you can see the top of the sideboard is covered in gibble.  Steve has three tables and the windowsill also covered in gibble. He complains regularly about how untidy I am!

I'm extremely glad to be rid of  the curtains that were blocking the bay. 

Within minutes of the fitter leaving, a neighbour knocked on our door. She wondered if she could have the curtain rail as we were no longer using it! I've no idea how she noticed so quickly that the curtains had been taken down. Steve had just finished explaining to me the reasons why he intended to leave the curtain rail in situ (these were basically rubbish) he just couldn't be bothered to take it down. But Steve was steamrollered in to taking the rail down and delivering it to a nearby flat.

Bobbing along

Steve is still cooking for himself and I'm cooking for me, he's not happy with this but it was his choice. He would like me to master the art of cooking ready meals and I've refused.

I'm no longer attending the daily get togethers in the summer house as Steve has decided he wishes to attend. We can't both go as we don't want to leave Beano on his own. In the summer the meetings are in the garden and Beano can come too. I currently can't hear so I wouldn't attend anyway. Maybe by the time Steve loses interest, my hearing will have improved, or maybe this is what I have to get used to.

The complex manager has left, she only started when we moved in but she was heard having a shouting match with a member of staff in the car park a few days ago. We are gradually getting work done on the flat, hopefully it will be finished before a new incumbent is hired!

I'm living with a stroppy teen!

Steve has just asked me how long I'd cook a gammon steak in the oven.

My reply, that I would fry or grill it, didn't go down well.

I'm sorry but that is how I cook gammon, unfortunately my reply was not acceptable.

Steve is now throwing things around on the kitchen, annoyed at how difficult and stupid I am.

Steve is going out on Friday with a friend, he is worried about how I'll cope with the Tesco delivery! I'm really looking forward to a day without being moaned at.

When I announced that I could no longer cope living on the boat I gave Steve the option of staying on the boat and I'd take half the savings and move  into rented accommodation.

Steve didn't want to do this, he wanted to move with me and so chose to sell the boat and buy a retirement flat. I know he wouldn't manage on the boat but that wouldn't have been my problem. I'd spent the previous year suggesting we move to a marina with better  access to transport but the only marina Steve was happy to move to had no room and a long waiting list.