I popped into the summer house this afternoon just after I'd walked Beano.
When I returned home Steve wanted to know why I went over there, so I explained that I wanted to ask Betty when I needed to make soup for.
Steve immediately started to rant on, it seems he wants to decide how the soup and roll events are worked out.
He's like Monica in Friends, having a meltdown if people don't obey his rules.
People don't want to have a rule book for every event, Steve does the BBQ's in the summer and then complains that it all gets left to him.
I walked back to our flat with another resident who isn't happy about the foodie things that are being organised.
She wanted to know why I was getting involved with cooking. I explained that as I had lost the ability to knit, sew and crochet, cooking was the only skill I have left that I can share. She was somewhat discomfited by my reply.
7 comments:
Wow you really take a lot of abuse. Aren't you tired of it?
You are doing incredibly well in your environment. It’s great that you are still participating and contributing. Don’t worry about what Steve says because you already know that he’s not impartial or thinking clearly let alone being supportive. Take your soup and if NONE of it is eaten then you know to change recipes and move on to something else you like making and enjoying. A few weeks ago I had a disaster with my old tried and true go to cookie recipe. Still no idea why. It happens! In sports any team can win on any given day. That’s why they play the game. It’s the same with our cooking and crafts. Just concentrate on what you like to do and enjoy. Keep on keeping on. You have lots of understanding support out here and I hope you can hear us over the Negative Nellies!
Please continue to do the the things that bring you joy, sharing a meal with others. It doesn't sound like there's much happiness currently in your life so please take care of yourself and your mental health. I admire the way you have stuck with your husband, but think about how you really want to spend your golden years. I've been reading your blog for many years and you've been through so much in the past in abusive relationships, I'm so sorry you've had to endure this. You deserve complete happiness and joy. Michelle x
I'm not sure why another resident seemingly isn't happy that you're getting involved with the 'food' side of things. Surely if she wants to be involved, she can volunteer her services, but she certainly does not have any right to express an opinion on you being involved.
The perfect answer to her query as to why you're cooking would have been "Because I want to"!
You need to practice saying that, to Steve, other residents, anyone who questions anything you choose to do, "Because I want to"!
You're a perfectly capable adult woman, who has every right (within the law obvs) to do whatever you damn well want to!!!!
Take care, Col X
Do what you want! I agree with Col.
Just reading Col's reply - that's exactly what I started doing with my Ex when he wasn't quite yet my Ex. "Where are you going? Why"? he'd ask. "None of your business, and because I choose to" would be my reply.
The other thing, also reminded by Col, when I was doing volunteer paperwork for an organisation, I got a lot of stick from another member because I wasn't organising events as well - it had been agreed I wouldn't be required to do that when I volunteered for the paperwork side. So the district manager informed him there was nothing stopping him organising an event; we never heard another peep out of him!
Please don't stop cooking; it's bad enough that your eyes won't allow you to do the crafts you loved and were so good at, so please keep doing what you want to do, and if anyone else doesn't like it, let 'em go play on the M1. (That's a busy motorway, for our non-UK friends).
I apologize for making the first comment about taking abuse. I just can't stand when people treat their spouse or partner with such disregard. I hope I didn't hurt your feelings. That was not my intention. Have a good weekend.
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