After a reshuffle at work hubby and I have come to a decision, he had his staff review last week, I had mine on Thursday.
I'm getting a pay cut of £120pa, but I do still have a job (redundancies were threatened).
Some people have lost as much as £3000, most have lost about £1000.
There are a lot of very annoyed support staff at work now, some in floods of tears.
Teaching staff are not being affected, it is always us at the bottom end of the scale who take the financial hit.
Hubby's job has been restructured and his position is untenable, he still has not fully recovered from losing his mum and the current stress is beginning to take it's toll on him already.
I am putting my house on the market, in some ways I am gutted, I fought so hard to get the house, which was a wreck, hubby worked hard to make it liveable.
This has had to be my decision as the house is in my sole name, but I think it is the correct decision for us.
We have decided to downsize so hubby can get out of what is rapidly becoming a toxic situation at work.
He is looking for another job but as he is 60 it is not going to be easy.
I'm madly decluttering, so much stuff to get rid of, I'm making copious lists, which stuff to give away, which stuff to sell. Which stuff will fit in a one bed place.
If we end up with one bed flat I may be able to keep my sewing machine, if we can only manage a studio apartment then I'll be lucky to keep even a crochet hook.
We are dog sitting this weekend, next weekend we are going to B&Q.
We need to get top dollar for this house so there are a few jobs we need to do to bring it up to scratch. I used to be a big fan of The House Doctor, so I am approaching my decluttering with that in mind.
We need to stay fairly local so I can still get to work and I can still support my DD. We will also put our name down for an allotment, so hubby can still enjoy his hobby.
I've cancelled Sky, downgraded our phone tariffs and bought a jar of peanut butter for me and some thinly sliced ham for hubby so we can take sandwiches to work from now on.
Yesterday I was offered 3 weeks cat sitting, this will make up the shortfall in my wages so I accepted gratefully.
14 comments:
Well done on coming to the decision to downsize in order to, eventually, have a less stressful life, especially for your husband. It sounds like you are having a particularly bad time at the moment, and I hope you pull through this period successfully. The main thing is to be together, and even if your new home will be much smaller, with the de-cluttering done, you will find you will be able to cope with a smaller space.
I'm surprised that more people don't take a packed lunch to work. In the days before carry-out coffee and sandwiches available just about everywhere, I prepared my husband's packed lunch every night and popped it into the fridge for him to take the next day. Sometimes I even prepared a salad on a place (smoked salmon on occasion, and once, just for a joke to kid his colleagues, lump fish roe so he could tell them he dined on caviar!) It seems to have become deeply unfashionable to carry one's home-prepared lunch to work, but in frugal times this habit is bound to return, and people will be the better for it both financially and heathily as they will know what's in the sandwiches/food, because they will know who's prepared them.
Margaret P
It's great when you make such a life changing decision. No matter what stresses come with selling the house, you will eventually have a more peaceful lifestyle. Good luck with your changes-you deserve some peace and happiness now-not in some imaginary future. Catriona in a very wintry Scotland.
Well done on coming up with a plan that is painful but logical. Don't go mad on the "throw out" stage, you will be surprised what some people will give you money for - try the free sites like Gumtree before the tip! Good first steps - Sky and mobile can eat money without you noticing. If, god forbid, we ever get really strapped it is my intention to go TV free, listen to the radio and use the library service twice a week using my free bus pass! I feel for your husband as I was in that job situation (a bit, not too toxic) at 60 and had to sit out 2.5 years till state pension kicked.
I'm wishing you and hubby the best as you declutter and move forward. My job had gotten so horrid that when I was able to retire I jumped at it. Less money on pension and social security but I have never looked back. It will be five years this September. Being miserable at work is so mentally and physically tough. It just isn't worth it.
It is a sign of strength that you are willing to make the hard choices. I have found that when my BS bucket is full it is healthier for me to just walk away. Stress is a killer and life is too damned short. I am routing for you two.
Joyce
I agree with the other posters life is too short to be stressed and miserable at work.
Fully agree with Trish you will be surprised at what people will buy. We moved a year ago and had lived in our previous house for 40 years so you can only imagine the clutter. We had old vinyl lps though they were in good condition, i was going to give them to the charity shop glad I didn't, advertised some of them individually in the free ads in our local newspaper. And surprise, surprise somebody came round and we accepted £300 for the lot, we had a lot of interest in them, it seems they are having a revival.
Just a quick bit of advice we found out, when you have your obligatory energy rating done don't necessarily go with a company that the estate agent might recommend as we did and were charged £95. I wrongly believed that they charge a set fee. But later found out that they don't and estate agencies add on a fee just for putting you in touch with them. I should have done shopped around and contacted them myself. I found out that I could have paid £50, gggrrrhh!!! You live and learn.
Kathy xxxx
I hope if ever I should come upon a situation like you have that I could be as strong as you are.
I think you are fabulous.
Much love -x-
I am sorry that things have come to this, but I applaud your decision, its a difficult one to make I know but yours and your husbands happiness is more important. I really hope you can find a flat with more than one bedroom.
I know it might go against the grain, it did with us, have you thought about applying for social housing, especially with your problems. I know its not the same as owning your own house.
We found ourselves in a position when we came back here 16 years ago. We had sold our house, but the money we had from the sale was not enough to put down on a house, even if you could get a mortgage, all of the banks etc we approached told us we were too old at 57 and 67. We had to rent in the private sector. We were lucky to get this bungalow last year, no one wanted it because it was too far out from the town. We love it.
We downsized in 2007, it gradually began to creep up again, so last year when we moved in here I got rid of a load more stuff. Having the 2 bedrooms meant I could keep my sewing machine and also my stash.
Take care, I hope your house does not take too long to sell and you are soon settled in some where new.
So sorry that you have been put in this situation, I hope you make top dollar on your house and that you get somewhere nice and cheap, good luck with the allotment too
Downsizing is a bit of a shock but I would rather have a small house, less stuff and some money to spare than a big house and no cash.
Good luck with the house sale - hope it is straightforward.
sounds like a good plan to make the best of a bad situation...sorry about the work stress...definitely not worth it...hoping everything works out for you quickly...
Alternative suggestion. Look for employment as a live-in domestic couple (e.g., cook / housekeeper & driver / gardener / maintenance man) - search "couple" in the job ads in The Lady. Keep the house and let it out to pay the mortgage (and hopefully make some additional cash) until ready to retire. Worth a thought? Anon.
My goodness you are a saint. What a generous decision you have made. You are so good to all your family, and I applaud it. I do sometimes wonder how long you can carry the load. Hopefully your stress will decrease with this decision. Take care.
If downsizing to a flat, it's likely to be leasehold and thus there would be ground rent and service charges to factor in to future costs. The service charges vary year on year and can be stratospheric if major works are planned (new roof to the block, etc.). Buying somewhere that's been fully renovated recently and which is managed by the tenants (e.g., through a right-to-manage company) would inoculate against unexpected expenditure to a degree. Apologies if preaching to the choir.
Anon again.
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