Some people are suited to it and some are not. I manage by being friendly to people but I keep my distance. It works for me.
Steve wants to be everybody's best friend which doesn't work well at all.
Yesterday he was clearing a patch of garden when a resident, John, shouted at him. Steve was refusing to go in to the garden ever again. But Harry has persuaded him to go out.
Historically the gardens here were maintained by a company, at some point the residents decided they'd rather manage the garden themselves and just have the company to mow the grass.
We have a small amount of garden outside our front door and below our bay window. These are ours to maintain, but, there's always a but isn't there! Some other residents feel they have the right to interfere.
There is no resident manager currently, the previous residential manager left some months before we moved here. Then there was a new manager appointed but she left after a few months.
The residential manager had friends amongst the residents here. This caused many problems mainly as lots of interesting and supposedly private titbits of knowledge were shared by the manager with those of the residents who were her special friends! Incredibly unprofessional of her I'm sure.
Eventually the manager left or was sacked though I don't know which. Those who were her special friends were upset, mainly as they no longer had access to information about their neighbours.
There was a new manager who was responsible for two courts when we first moved in but she left after a few weeks. She didn't drive and was travelling from London every day.
Our next manager, when one is appointed, will work alternate weeks between here and another site. Working 3 days one week and 2 days the next. Meanwhile we are still being charged for our non-existent manager. Things are afoot to challenge this.
Steve is gradually planting up our small area and upsetting our neighbours at the same time. He has planted a Peace rose, a clematis and some lavender. Bob the Knob has very strict requirements about any planting and we are expected to clear our planting plans with him as he has a list of plants he hates. He particularly hates poppies so no doubt I will plant some of those.
John, upstairs doesn't wish to see anybody in the garden as it spoils his view. So he shouts at everyone, I have an old, short phrase that I shout back. Quite how he expects me to take Beano out for a walk without going through my front door, I'm not sure.
Another resident, Dora, owns a cat, a large and unfriendly tom cat that bears an uncanny resemblance to Nanny Ogg's cat Greebo. Poor Beano is terrified of the brute and will go to great lengths to avoid it. Dora also feels the need to check out planting in case we should wish to plant anything that will harm her cat. Whilst I'm not keen on her cat, I do like cats in general and I'm well aware of which plants are toxic to cats and would never plant anything poisonous. She still feels the need to check regularly. Dora was originally very welcoming when we first arrived but when she visited and asked for a lift to town and I explained that I no longer had a car she did not call again.
12 comments:
Sounds a lot like my mother in law's senior apartment complex. I would not be a "nice" neighbor and let the others bully me.
Hugs
I guess the old timers feel they have more rights than newbies. Just hang around until some new arrives and the focus will go on them!
What a nightmare of a complex, it’s like being back at school, I think I would be upsetting neighbours left right and centre if I lived there,it sounds like school yard mentality! I’m glad you are strong enough to ignore many,and you have the gorgeous Beano to escape with!! X
Smile, nod, answer 'yes' - and then do whatever you were going to do in the first place. If anyone asks inappropriate questions look at your wrist as if consulting a watch and say 'Oh, late August, I think'. Subject only to not planting poison ivy or anything too poisonous plant what pleases you in your part of the garden - and suggest that the bullies kiss your watering can. JMHO. :-)
We found when we moved to our apartment that not everyone has the same interpretation of what communal living involves and some are much more entitled than others. We have adapted, we don't always like it, but the benefits far outweigh the problems. Keep on keeping on.
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Wow this would be a great plot for a TV drama! You must have the patience of a saint to put up with all that.
I'm sure your short sentence is 'that's nice', just like Mrs Brown learned at her elocution lessons!
It sounds just like the small complex that my Mum lives in. The communal areas and the gardens are at the mercy of the tenants, as like you apart from grass cutting the little bungalows that sit below the flats have all claimed the bit of soil under their windows as their own. My Mum had hers really beautifully planted, luckily her friend and next door neighbour is keeping it up for her now she can no longer do it.
This all confirms my decision never to move to a communal living apartment; I don't have the strength necessary to stand up to bullies. Thankfully I have a bungalow, so should be ok here for the rest of my life *touch wood*.
Thank goodness for little Beano; he must be a touch of sanity amongst all the madness.
I'm glad you have something apt to say to your difficult neighbours. I generally think of something cutting to say about five minutes after whoever has annoyed me (usually when driving) has gone past. I was going to suggest a sneaky sprinkling of poppy seeds in the gardens but poppies are poisonous to dogs so maybe not a good idea. I garden voluntarily at a local tiny zoo so I have to check if the plants are toxic to any of the animals. PS Your lamb pie sounds delicious.
God, I'd hate it! I've never liked the thought of a flat never mind communal living so you have my sympathies. Busy bodies do my head in. Why do some people feel the need to stick their beaks into everything? I think I can guess what your short phrase is and I think mine would be the same Anglo Saxon response. Keep your chin up!
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