Tuesday 18 April 2023

Stressed

We had a visit today from the temporary manager, I've no idea why as I only arrived back from walking the dog as she was leaving.

I shall email her tomorrow to try and discover what is going on.

I think one of the residents has made a complaint about Steve, it wouldn't surprise me as he does seem to be falling out with everybody.

He has decided he wants to move to Newbury, this is fine but I don't want to move.

If he does go I shall have to move as I can't afford to live here alone.

Time will tell!

12 comments:

ana s. said...

Does the temp manager know about Steve's history? I see no reason to keep it secret since it does explain some of his activity and attitude. Clearly there are others in the community that have similar issues with human interaction. Praying for you.

Anonymous said...

Is there something special in Newbury that he prefers to where you are now? I suspect that no matter WHERE he lives, he will not be happy, because he thinks he can continue to live on a narrowboat and that is NOT possible but he can't understand that since his stroke. And with the many personality changes that occur and argumentativeness that many stroke victims continue to have (which I suspect your partner has in spades), it is difficult for them to get along with others so to speak. So many folks that I know of that have a partner that has suffered a stroke have similar issues with their partners post-stroke. You have the patience of a SAINT.
Dawn P. Albany, GA USA

Robin from P'ville said...

Oh for goodness sakes.

Donna said...

You are a wonderful caretaker!
But, you know deep down, it's not him talking...and he won't be happy anywhere he moves to. Just try and stick with the doctors you now have...and see how it goes for now. I'm with Ana...you should have a private chat with the manager.
hugs
Donna

Col said...

@Robin from P'ville,
What does your message even mean?

Col said...

Stand your ground with Steve, and make it perfectly clear to him that if he wants to move, it's tough. YOU will be staying precisely where you are!
Of course his behaviour isn't all his fault, but he wouldn't be happy wherever he lived. Try to have a word with management about Steve's condition, explaining your situation. Just because Steve is not in the best of health and has perhaps annoyed various other residents, there is no valid reason for them to complain to management about him.
You have paid for your apartment, and are paying your fees to live in the complex, therefore the rest of the residents should grow up!
When a lot of different folk live close together, there are always going to be personality clashes and differences of opinion, but 'running to teacher' because someone has upset them is pathetic in the extreme.
I hope that your short comment to John upstairs is always two words, the second of which is 'off' the first could be 'buzz' or something stronger, much, much stronger! X

Ellen D. said...

I agree with Ana S. You should explain Steve's medical problem so they might understand his behavior better.
But, also, you should live where you want to live.

Hard up Hester said...

We don't have a manager, the one that was in place when we moved in, walked out and there isn't a replacement as yet. We have occasional visits from the managers of other sites.

Rambler said...

So did the temporary manager speak to Steve and what did he say about her visit? It's good that you can email her to ask why she had visited and to explain Steve's condition. She needs to know so that she doesn't just have opinions & complaints from other residents.
As has been said, you are paying for the right to live where you are; you definitely want to stay there and Steve isn't capable of deciding otherwise.
Please try not to stress and worry about your situation; I'm pretty sure there are ways to ensure you are able to live where you want. Is Steve even capable of getting himself to Newbury and finding a place to live? Maybe a further assessment of his deterioration due to his stroke is needed. If things continue to get worse, he might have to go into a care home, in which case, you would be eligible for benefits to help with rent, Housing Benefit, etc. Also, a better chance of being re-housed as a single person.

flis said...

All I can add is that it is exhausting living day in day out with a difficult husband - I just try to let is wash over me - though difficult -If not I shall drown x

Col said...

Part of the service charges every apartment is paying is to employ a manager at the site. You should all demand that the site owners 'pull their fingers out' and get a manager there, now!

Chris said...

How frustrating!

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