TWELVE COMMANDMENTS FOR SENIORS
#1 - Talk to yourself. There are times you need expert advice
#2 - “In Style” are the clothes that still fit.
#3 - You don't need anger management. You need people to stop pissing you off.
#4 - Your people skills are just fine. It's your tolerance for idiots that needs work.
#5 - The biggest lie you tell yourself is, “I don't need to write that down. I'll remember it.”
#6 - “On time” is when you get there.
#7 - Even duct tape can't fix stupid - but it sure does muffle the sound.
#8 - It would be wonderful if we could put ourselves in the dryer for ten minutes, then come out wrinkle-free and three sizes smaller?
#9 - Lately, You've noticed people your age are so much older than you.
#10 - Growing old should have taken longer.
#11 - Aging has slowed you down, but it hasn't shut you up.
#12 - You still haven't learned to act your age, and hope you never will.
And one more:
“One for the road” means peeing before you leave the house.
#1 - Talk to yourself. There are times you need expert advice
#2 - “In Style” are the clothes that still fit.
#3 - You don't need anger management. You need people to stop pissing you off.
#4 - Your people skills are just fine. It's your tolerance for idiots that needs work.
#5 - The biggest lie you tell yourself is, “I don't need to write that down. I'll remember it.”
#6 - “On time” is when you get there.
#7 - Even duct tape can't fix stupid - but it sure does muffle the sound.
#8 - It would be wonderful if we could put ourselves in the dryer for ten minutes, then come out wrinkle-free and three sizes smaller?
#9 - Lately, You've noticed people your age are so much older than you.
#10 - Growing old should have taken longer.
#11 - Aging has slowed you down, but it hasn't shut you up.
#12 - You still haven't learned to act your age, and hope you never will.
And one more:
“One for the road” means peeing before you leave the house.
15 comments:
Fantastic list...I'll follow it religiously if I don't forget! Wait..I'll write it down!
Brilliant, read it out to Tom and had a laugh, what more can you ask of a post.
Love the last one.
Briony
x
Oh dear - every single one applies to me.
Brilliant :-)
sounds about right.
That made me smile, very funny.
I laughed so much that it was a good thing that I was wearing a Depends undergarment. I can fully relate to those statements - each and everyone of them.
Myra, from Winnipeg, Canada where the humidex (how hot it feels, not the exact temp) is +40C for today and next week!!!!
Yes-spot on.I've noticed that in the last few months I am just like that.When I'm walking my dogs I have noticed I have muttered out loud things that irritate me and for a moment I think"oh dear I hope no one heard me"and then "s*d it I'm not Bothered"x
Oh yes, those are just right! Thanks for the smile!
Well, I'm sure #9 is definitely right!
Brilliant and so true!
Love them all! Thanks for the laugh!
All of these have applied to me for many years! It’s good to know that we all feel the same 🤣🤣🤣
So true! I'm going to copy and post that.
I texted #7 to my husband while he was at work. Suggested he try the duck tape on his boss. :)
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