It is what it is and I just have to manage.
I'm getting used to the constant moaning and bitching. I've still not managed to do anything right.
I'm getting used to doing everything at a snails pace, the going over and over every plan ad infinitum, the refusal to wear hearing aids, the constant complaints that I don't speak clearly.
I'm still struggling to cope with the twitching legs when he's trying to brake when I'm driving. The frantic screams of STOP, STOP, STOP when he forgets that green lights mean go. The constant hand flapping because he thinks I'm in the wrong lane. Today he shouted at me to get a move on before we missed the lights, he was oblivious of the learner who's car had stalled just in front of us.
14 comments:
I understand your statement 'you need to speak clearer', I am told this often, to which I kindly say, I don't had an issue with speaking, you do have issues with hearing. It's frustrating.
As you say Poppy very frustrating and on the third repeat of everything I say he gets cross because I'm shouting!!
As Steve seems to be very anxious has he been prescribed any anti-anxiety medication? Just a thought but I thought it might lessen his heightened state of stress, and hopefully yours too.
Linda, yes it is one of the things he takes.
Don’t all husbands consider it acceptable to criticise a wife’s driving? I refuse to drive mine, I get annoyed at the sharp intake of breath and the footbrake action.
The safest alternative may be to strap him in the near side back seat Hester, with the child lock on the door.
If he were mine I would consider putting him in the boot.
Best wishes,
NellieGrace
We have to play the hand that we get dealt, unfortunately. So we do.
I sympathise - I had much the same with my late husband's dementia.
Mine is unable to control his volume sometimes hes bellowing at me and doesnt realise other times he thinks hes said things and then hes bellowing at me , but he hasnt said a thing . It does attract attention at times. That and comments about his monotone days and how boring he is repeating stuff over and over . They should do it 24 7
I feel so sorry for you. Hopefully you are able to get your frustration off your chest at Stroke Club. Maybe there is a different anxiety medicine or a stronger dose. I hope you are able to have regular time away from your husband to go out with friends or attend a club. My husband 's stroke affected his body more his left side is more or less paralysed but his mood is less affected although he does have anxiety. Fortunately he ties very hard not to criticise my driving . I think this must be hell for him because he was a much better driver than me. Keep your chin up.
I'm hoping to persuade him to do something as a hobby as at the moment we neither of us get a break from each other.
He cannot have anything stronger for his anxiety.
You are a good woman, Hester. Much better than I.
Joyce
I have this and there is nothing wrong with my hubby. It is so bad I hate going in the car. I know I will have to take over driving at some point and I am dreading it.
I have just been accused of messing up the radio programmes in the car. Arrrrrhhhhhhh
I do sympathise with you. My husband died two years ago with a Glioblastoma - a totally untreatable and very agressive brain tumour. Luckily for me - and not always the case with this particular tumour - he just faded gently away. When I read of the suffering of others I know I have something to be grateful for.
Hugs x
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